Post by Therdde on Dec 1, 2008 18:18:48 GMT -5
Characters:
Nayeli - Female Adolescent Cougar
Kein - Male Adolescent Cougar
- Snowy Highlands -
Life, despite being filled with so many new things each and every day, seems to finally be settling down into somewhat of a routine. Nayeli can expect a day to have plenty of interaction with other Sisters in the tribe, her mate to be busy with border patrol for a good portion of the day's hours, and more than likely something rather unexpected to happen. News of Azriel, encounters with two very different wolves at different times... yes, life is both new and yet routine, now, and Nayeli can't say that she minds at all. Even now, as she waits for Kein to find her sitting atop a snowy hill, the Matron can't help but think of what's happened even today. Her only concern is that Kein might not take too well to the news. Most likely he will, but there's always a nagging doubt that does its best to bother her while she waits.
By the time Kein arrives to where he usually finds Nayeli, he has had time to think about everything that female wolf said. She never seemed to be lying, and he is inclined to believe her, but he will leave the final judgment up to his mate, and possible the Shamaness. They have time. Two days. What is more important, though, is Kasim. It is certainly what he intends to talk about first... But not before he greets his mate. When he spots her, he smiles, though he remains quiet until he is closer.
She's smoothed the snow back as much as she could, and with Chandani's help, they've done a fairly decent job of it. As Nayeli notices her mate finally approaching, she stretches out a little, smiling back at him. Will he notice the snow? Has he been through here anytime recently and seen it before she and Chandani were able to fix it back? It took a long time, after all!
Perhaps he is too preoccupied with other things. No strangers have been in this area. That is all that matters to him. After a short while, he reaches her, and moves to nuzzle against her. Only after doing so does he ask, "How was your day?" He does not know if Chandani has yet had the opportunity to do as he asked. It doesn't matter. She is smiling, so he expects the answer to be positive.
Whether good news or bad, just seeing Kein and thinking of how much he means to her will always cause Nayeli to smile. At least, she wants to hope that it will, and as of yet it's proven to be the case. And it's not that she's worried that he's going to be brutally attacked while roaming along the tribal perimeter, but it /is/ good to see him back, safe and well. As he nuzzles her, she lets out a contented purr. "It went well, thanks. Chandani and I were able to.. take care of something. I need to tell you, now that we're finally finished."
So, Chandani did manage to visit. Kein has no idea what Nayeli is talking about. They took care of something? All he was expecting them to do was talk, so he asks, without moving away from her, "What is it?" He probably wouldn't even ask, but, well, she did say she needs to tell him...
"It's.. your mother. I know I probably should have asked you first, but.. I didn't think you'd want to talk about it." Nayeli tries not to grimace, but it isn't easy. This has been and probably always will be a sensitive subject for her friend, and understandably so. "It seemed like such a dishonor to leave her in the birthing den, so.. I asked my sister to help, and we moved her here, and finally finished burying her." There's nothing mentioned about how bad she smelled, or how difficult it was to drag her here, or even how hard it was to dig up the snowy ground. A rather crude grave, perhaps, but at least Kein will hopefully be able to gain comfort from knowing that his mother's body is at rest, and perhaps he'll be finally able to enter that den again, even if it does take some force of will to get past the memory-induced hesitation or reluctance.
Yes, it is, and always will be, a sensitive subject. And it is very far from what Kein was expecting. For a good while, he /can't/ respond, but from the very second he hears her news, what he feels is... Well, beyond his ability to describe, but certainly not negative. She doesn't have to say it. He knows what kind of trouble they must have gone through to do what they did. It is something he never would have been able to do, if only because he would have been overcome upon seeing her. But they did it, and he has no doubt that at least some of the reason they did it was for him. All thoughts of his own news temporarily gone from his mind, he closes his eyes and takes a couple deep, if ragged, breaths, before he finally feels like he can keep control of his voice. "Thank you." He speaks quietly, and his voice is full of emotion. Sorrow, yes... But also relief, love, and gratitude.
Most likely not to same extent that Kein is, but Nayeli is also relieved, and this because Kein seems genuinely appreciative of what she's done. At his simple words of gratitude, she leans closer and gives him a lick on the cheek, but keeps her maw up by his ear. "She'd be so proud of you and what you've become, as am I." It'd be an interesting comparison to see who loves Kein more. But can such a comparison even be made? It's an entirely different relationship, and Nayeli isn't sure that she'd even want to try such a thing. All she knows is that she loves her mate with absolute certainty, and it is definitely a relief to know that her actions did indeed have the desired results.
Funny, that Kasim said almost the same thing earlier. Kein has done very well at handling his grief on his own time, so that he can be the strong mate that he thinks Nayeli wants when they are together, but at hearing that his mother has been put to rest... And put to rest here, close to where they are... That he can finally visit her resting place... Well, it's harder to ignore, now. He forces himself to take another deep breath before he speaks, but his voice is still weaker than it was seconds ago. "I wish... I just miss her. So much." No different than how Nayeli feels about her own parents, he's certain. No different than how Kasim must feel. Kein has no right to force his mourning onto them, and there is no one else he could talk to about it.
Yes, she does indeed miss her parents. But can Nayeli compare her grief to Kein's? It's certainly not the first time that she feels immensely guilty for not being closer to her mother, let alone her father. Can she blame their wandering and seeming disinterest in her for that? Of course not. "I know you do, and I miss her as well. All of us do." She sighs, nuzzling at his neck. Of course they don't miss her nearly as much as Kein, but it's the best consolation she can offer.
As soon as he's able... As soon as everyone leaves this area, he will have to come here by himself. Kein knows this. And he knows that as soon as he does, as soon as he gives himself the chance to visit her and say goodbye... It will hurt, but then he can finally start to really heal, instead of just his current getting better at hiding it. Now is not that time, though. For now, he just moves so that he can lie down beside Nayeli, pressing himself against her once he does. Regardless of what he might be feeling in this moment, this really is one of the most meaningful things she has ever done for him, and he loves her immensely for it.
Nayeli has made it a point to avoid the area where her own parents died; she doesn't even want to think if there's anything left of their bodies other than bones, assuming the scavengers have found them. And even though some might think it a fitting end for her father, she certainly isn't going to agree with that. As Kein lies down, she does the same, beginning to purr softly again. If he wants to pursue conversation with her, she's more than willing to do so, but if he wants to just be together with her, lost in his memories and thoughts, then that's fine as well. She can be a good shoulder to lean on as well as a listening ear, yep!
Kein doesn't speak for a long while. It takes him time to sort his thoughts. He remains pressed against Nayeli, though. When he finally does speak, his voice is not quite back to normal, but he is much calmer, more relaxed, than he was immediately after Nayeli spoke. "They were going to try to have more cubs. Mom told me right before you and I left." Was his mother already pregnant when Chesmu killed her? Should he be mourning his unborn siblings along with his mother? He'll never know, and it's not the type of thing he would ever ask Kasim, but... Whether his Mom was pregnant at the time of her death or not, those cubs /did/ exist, even if only his, Mom's, and Kasim's minds.
"New brothers and sisters.." Nayeli breathes, thinking of how wonderful that could've been for Kein. And if it hadn't been for the senseless rape and murder of his mother, no doubt it would have happened, and Kein might even have a sister again. The Matron can't help but sigh, wondering yet again if she should feel bitter for what her father did. "It's kind of scary to think that unless something new happens, you and I are going to be the only parents in the entire tribe."
Kein gives a nod of his head. Yes, it is kind of scary, but... They'll have plenty of help, he knows. "Nayeli... Kasim will be staying here... I don't think he'll ever have another chance at having his own cubs, but... We can give him grandchildren." There are many reasons why Kein wants Kasim to be the one his cubs know as their grandfather, but this is the line of thought his brain has taken. Of course, given that she /is/ already pregnant, there should be no question as to what he is proposing.
So he /is/ staying. Nayeli does feel some sense of relief, as even though her relationship to the older male is still somewhat awkward, especially after Maulisho's death, she knows that it'll be good for Kein to have the support of his adopted father. Once again, she's reminded of how much she needs to talk to Kasim one-on-one and resolve anything and everything that may or may not be between them. Her biggest fear is that Kasim doesn't see her as a worthy mate for his adopted son, or even a worthy Matron for the tribe. "I'm glad he'll still be here," she answers simply. Perhaps not as glad as Kein is, but she /is/ happy, nonetheless.
If Kein knew she has those fears, he would do everything he could to help her set them aside. Kasim has never expressed doubt if Nayeli's worthiness. Kein never would have expected that he would. That is not what is on the male's mind, though. Apparently, though, he was not clear enough. "I know you were upset that I didn't tell you the truth about Azriel... And I don't want to suggest that we make a habit of lying to our cubs, but..." Would Kein be happier if he didn't know about Azriel? Probably. "I really want them to have one loving grandparent, Nayeli."
"And what happens when they learn the truth? What if they get even more upset than I was?" The words are out almost before Nayeli is aware that she's responding. She's not angry or upset; her tone reflects the wariness and hesitation that she's feeling. Yes, it would be a very difficult thing to tell the cubs the truth. And yes, it would also be a very difficult thing to tell them what they both know is a deliberate lie, no matter how much Kein wants to call Kasim his real father. "I'm sorry," Nayeli says, sighing. "I shouldn't have said that."
Kein is not surprised by how she receives what he says... Which is not to say that it doesn't upset him, to some degree. He is determined not to respond in anger, though. He looks away from her, but he doesn't move away. Though he knows how /not/ to respond, he can't figure out how /to/ respond. In part, it's because she's right, but... Kein was far more upset by the truth than by the fact that it took his mother so long to tell him. Finally, quietly, he says, "No, it's... Well, you had reason to say what you did..." Just like Kein had reason, very good reason, to bring this up.
He's right, but he hasn't exactly answered her concerns. Perhaps they both just need time to think it over. Certainly they can get advice from Paoro or from Kasim, but the decision will ultimately be theirs to make. What if they strongly disagree? Nayeli knows that sooner or later something will come up that they can't agree on. What then? They'll just have to deal with that when it comes. But for now, she's silent, leaning a bit into Kein as she knows he's feeling upset.
Kein is quiet for a while longer, mostly just trying to decide where he should go from here. He shouldn't sleep without telling Nayeli about that wolf, and he did promise Kasim he could do what he could, not just bring it up and then drop it. Finally, Kein takes a deep breath. She was the one who got upset because she wasn't told about Azriel immediately, so... "I will respect whatever you decide, Nayeli, but... Kasim is much more of a father to me than Azriel could ever be. I didn't understand that when my mother told me, because... Well, because children don't understand things like that. I'm not saying we should never tell them. Only that we should wait to decide when to tell them, and that I don't see a reason why Kasim can't be known as their grandfather in the meantime." That's probably as calmly as he could say it, and now he is prepared to let it rest. "Just... Think about it, okay? If you decide the risk of upsetting them is too great, then I'll understand."
"Of course I will think about it," Nayeli tries to convince and comfort her friend as best as she's able. She can't promise anything on what the outcome will be, but whichever way she decides, she'll definitely keep Kein's thoughts on the matter in perspective. "There are so many things we'll have to figure out.. what to tell the cubs, how to tell the cubs, when to tell the cubs.." She trails off with somewhat of a wistful smile. "I think the hardest part will be teaching them how to talk. If you think about it, how /do/ you teach that? Just talk to them, I guess..."
Kein doesn't really remember how his mother spoke to him when he was just learning to talk. He knows how she taught him words, but how to speak? "I think that's something they just learn by example." At least, he /hopes/ that's something they learn by example, because otherwise, his cubs may well grow up never being able to talk.
Nayeli nods slowly, pondering his words. "I'm sure they'll pick up running and wrestling and pouncing and all that pretty easily." But how easily will things like talking and thinking come? She has to admit to herself that she's deathly afraid of the possibility that one of her cubs might go completely crazy the way her father did. Or even worse, the thought of Kein doing that. Paoro didn't really offer much of an explanation of why it happened, so what's to say it couldn't happen again?
Kein has no idea what might be on Nayeli's mind. At what she says, he smiles, quite certain that he learned how to wrestle before he learned how to talk, or at least before he learned to talk well. "I wonder how many there will be and... What they'll be." Though he hasn't given it much thought yet... Kein has to admit to himself that he is especially concerned about what traits his sons, if he has any, might inherit. It he would admit, for even the slightest moment, that his mother, mate, and his mate's mother and grandmother have any negative qualities, he would still argue that they are dwarved by the good qualities those females possess. He, Azriel, and Chesmu, on the other paw...
Is there even any way to tell how many cubs she might be carrying? She certainly doesn't feel any heavier, or at least not that she can easily notice. "I hope that.. they're all born okay." Perhaps she's a bit biased, given that she's the one who'll be giving birth, but she really /does/ want them to be born healthy and without any complications. Nayeli falls silent, purring and leaning some more into Kein, relishing the feeling of his warm body pressed up against hers. Even the daunting intimidation of childbirth doesn't seem quite as bad knowing that her mate will be supporting her through it all. Though, from what she's heard, males are supposed to stay away during the actual event. Why she would want Kein to not be there with her is something she can't possibly imagine, but perhaps Paoro would be able to explain it for her.
Who wouldn't want everything to be okay? The birthing process, and his cubs. What if something is physically wrong with one of them, or...? Kein sighs and pushes the thought away, then nuzzles against Nayeli as he says, "Everything will be okay." Kein might recognize something going wrong as a possibility, but at least his mother and Ayashe never had any problems that he knows about, so there isn't that added fear there.
If only she could be absolutely confident that Kein's words will be true. But the various 'what-if?' scenarios will no doubt be running through her head for a long time; her goal will be to minimize them to the point of non-issues. Nayeli doesn't say anything in response to Kein's words, but continues purring and pressing into him. That should be response enough, as words simply would not do justice for her current state of emotion and affection for Kein.
Kein is content to just lie beside Nayeli for a while, enjoying his mate's company. THey may not have resolved anything, and he would not be surprised if it is a while before they do, but at least he knows they can talk about these things without letting their own issues get in the way of them communicating. He doesn't want to push it off until they are both too tired to talk about the situation, though, so, after a few minutes, he says, "There is one other thing. I ran into another wolf, a little bit ago." Surely, they did not come this often when he was a cub.
No, they indeed did not. Not even while Kein and his family were away from Amaranth. "A third wolf?" Nayeli doesn't even try to hide the surprise in her voice. "Trespassing again, or just near the border?" Why the sudden incursion of lupines? Is something happening that's making the mountain a viable location to travel to? It's not as if their boundaries aren't clearly marked, so there really is no excuse for ignorance as opposed to deliberate trespassing, whether because of malice, mischievous, or just simply not caring.
"Trespassing. Not far from here." The entire encounter was far more relaxed than the situation with Hinto, though, and Kein continues speaking. "She claims she has been here before, that she is a friend... And she wants to stay this time. Her and two others." Kein does not speak too quickly, does not try to fit absolutely everything the wolf said in before Nayeli can get a word in.
Three wolves wanting to stay in Amaranth? Whatever happened to their packlands down around the base of the mountain and surrounding territories? Nayeli's initial reaction is decidedly negative; with cubs due to be born in only a matter of weeks, does she really want three /wolves/ here on their mountain? Even one wolf would make her uneasy, as she doesn't have the knowledge and experience with their kind that Kein does. Even if this wolf claims that she is a friend, can they really trust her? Should they really trust her, especially once there are young and helpless cubs that need protection? "It's.. your decision, Chieftain. You know wolves far better than I do, and our safety is your responsibility, and I know you don't take that lightly."
If Kein were less concerned about the safety of the members of his tribe, he might have allowed the wolf to stay immediately, because as much as he is concerned with their safety, he also recognizes that they should be compassionate to others, when they can. "She says they were driven away from their home by cougars to the north. It might be my choice to make... And I don't think she was lying, or that she's a threat... But I wasn't going to let her stay here before talking to you, and maybe Paoro." Maybe Paoro would be better able to confirm the wolf's story than Nayeli. If everything the wolf said was true, she would have last been here about six months ago, and there's no guarantee Nayeli would remember, if the two ever even met.
The chances of this being the wolf that Nayeli did meet a long time ago are next to nothing, so she doesn't even consider that as a possibility. The Matron is more concerned with hearing of wolves being driven away by cougars. The last thing she wants to worry about is getting caught up in a conflict, especially when one of the parties are their own kind. Of course, it's also entirely possible that the two cougars are Azriel and a mate, and in which case she would be more than happy to assist any who are opposed to him. "This is something I've never heard of happening before, so I agree--it will be important to get Paoro's input on this."
"Perhaps we could look for her together, come morning. We have a couple days, but... I don't want to put it off." Kein is not exactly nervous about talking to the shamaness without his mate there. Not really. Most of the reason he suggests they look for Paoro together is just so they can spend some time together. They haven't managed much of that in the past few days.
"And there's no way to know how long it will take us to find the shamaness," Nayeli adds, even with the knowledge that Paoro has all but guaranteed that she'll be staying in Amaranth territory from now on. "Do you think it would be possible to meet these wolves before we talk to Paoro? I'd like to at least get a feeling of what their intentions might be. Not that I don't trust your judgment, of course," she corrects herself hastily, "but it would be nice to at least get to meet them before a decision is made."
"Of course." If Nayeli were worried about his judgement, she wouldn't have originally said it was his choice to make. Kein is, in no way, worried that she doesn't trust him. Quickly, though, he adds, "I don't think they're all wolves, though... The wolf said she was traveling with dogs. I've never heard of them before." His life has not been so sheltered as Nayeli's, but he knows nothing of the domesticated and feral species that live far to the north of here.
Dogs? What are those? If Nayeli was feeling hesitant before, now she's /really/ feeling reluctant. It's one thing to let a wolf not only onto Amaranth land, but to actually /live/ here... and now two others of a species that she's never even heard of? Yes, she definitely wants to meet them now. "When can we meet them? And.. I'm assuming it will be safe without having to take others with us?" Surely Kein would have discerned that much during their first encounter?
"It will be safe. I believe Nium intends to stay with them until we make a decision. I don't think they could provide a risk even to the two of us, but with Nium there as well..." No, there is no danger, or at least minimal danger, or Kein would be a good deal more reluctant about leading Nayeli to where the wolf and dogs are waiting. "I don't see any reason why we can't just go in the morning." She does want to see them before speaking to Paoro, after all.
The female smiles and rubs her head up against Kein. "Maybe you can get Kasim to take care of the patrol for the day? Then we can not only talk to the three and perhaps find Paoro as well, but have the rest of the day to ourselves." Surely there's nothing wrong with that, right? Nayeli doesn't think Kasim would mind, and even if he does, well.. Kein'll just have to be persuasive then, yep!
Yes, because being perspective worked really well today. Regardless, Kein nods slightly. "I will ask him." Even though Kein won't have particularly good news for the older male, he doesn't think Kasim would mind. "He was going to sleep when I left him earlier, though, so that will have to wait for tomorrow as well." It's shaping up to be a rather busy day, to say the least.
Busy day.. how about a busy week? It's starting to sink in just how little she knows about being diplomatic to new species, especially with one of them being one that she's never even /heard/ of before! But with Kein there, she's sure that it'll go just fine. Nayeli is more concerned with making sure that Amaranth as a whole is portrayed in a positive light, especially since it seems that cougars already have a bad reputation with these three. "Why do you think they came to us? If they're running from cougars, why seek sanctuary with more of the same? Why not seek shelter in a wolfpack or a dog.. pack?" Do dogs even have packs?
Kein rests against Nayeli, now, slowly lowering his head. He doesn't expect to sleep immediately, but it does feel good to finally rest after everything that has happened today. "I don't know. If the wolf... Skelaghe... was telling the truth, maybe we're the only group she knew, or the closest." There are plenty of explanations, he's sure.
So what happens if they agree, and the pursuing cougars come after them? Nayeli can't imagine how she's supposed to explain to other cougars that while wolves and dogs are welcome to stay in Amaranth land, other cougars aren't. Is that really a wise decision to make? She's still not even sure if she believes this wolf who claims to be a friend of the tribe. Nayeli only remembers ever seeing one wolf in Amaranth territory before, and she definitely doesn't recall either of her parents ever talking about friendly relations with wolves. "I guess we'll find out tomorrow." And though her mind wants to stay active with all of the possibilities that could arise from this decision, she forces herself to slow down and try and fall asleep. Tomorrow will come, and they can face those decisions with rested bodies and minds.
What kind of message would it send if they turned away animals only seeking a place to rest while accepting animals who would not only drive animals from their homes, but also track them for whatever distance even once they left? Kein truly is leaning in favor of allowing Skelaghe and her companions to stay, but he is not terribly worried about it, for now. with a smile, he moves his head enough to give Nayeli a light nuzzle, then says, "Sleep well."
Nayeli - Female Adolescent Cougar
Kein - Male Adolescent Cougar
- Snowy Highlands -
Life, despite being filled with so many new things each and every day, seems to finally be settling down into somewhat of a routine. Nayeli can expect a day to have plenty of interaction with other Sisters in the tribe, her mate to be busy with border patrol for a good portion of the day's hours, and more than likely something rather unexpected to happen. News of Azriel, encounters with two very different wolves at different times... yes, life is both new and yet routine, now, and Nayeli can't say that she minds at all. Even now, as she waits for Kein to find her sitting atop a snowy hill, the Matron can't help but think of what's happened even today. Her only concern is that Kein might not take too well to the news. Most likely he will, but there's always a nagging doubt that does its best to bother her while she waits.
By the time Kein arrives to where he usually finds Nayeli, he has had time to think about everything that female wolf said. She never seemed to be lying, and he is inclined to believe her, but he will leave the final judgment up to his mate, and possible the Shamaness. They have time. Two days. What is more important, though, is Kasim. It is certainly what he intends to talk about first... But not before he greets his mate. When he spots her, he smiles, though he remains quiet until he is closer.
She's smoothed the snow back as much as she could, and with Chandani's help, they've done a fairly decent job of it. As Nayeli notices her mate finally approaching, she stretches out a little, smiling back at him. Will he notice the snow? Has he been through here anytime recently and seen it before she and Chandani were able to fix it back? It took a long time, after all!
Perhaps he is too preoccupied with other things. No strangers have been in this area. That is all that matters to him. After a short while, he reaches her, and moves to nuzzle against her. Only after doing so does he ask, "How was your day?" He does not know if Chandani has yet had the opportunity to do as he asked. It doesn't matter. She is smiling, so he expects the answer to be positive.
Whether good news or bad, just seeing Kein and thinking of how much he means to her will always cause Nayeli to smile. At least, she wants to hope that it will, and as of yet it's proven to be the case. And it's not that she's worried that he's going to be brutally attacked while roaming along the tribal perimeter, but it /is/ good to see him back, safe and well. As he nuzzles her, she lets out a contented purr. "It went well, thanks. Chandani and I were able to.. take care of something. I need to tell you, now that we're finally finished."
So, Chandani did manage to visit. Kein has no idea what Nayeli is talking about. They took care of something? All he was expecting them to do was talk, so he asks, without moving away from her, "What is it?" He probably wouldn't even ask, but, well, she did say she needs to tell him...
"It's.. your mother. I know I probably should have asked you first, but.. I didn't think you'd want to talk about it." Nayeli tries not to grimace, but it isn't easy. This has been and probably always will be a sensitive subject for her friend, and understandably so. "It seemed like such a dishonor to leave her in the birthing den, so.. I asked my sister to help, and we moved her here, and finally finished burying her." There's nothing mentioned about how bad she smelled, or how difficult it was to drag her here, or even how hard it was to dig up the snowy ground. A rather crude grave, perhaps, but at least Kein will hopefully be able to gain comfort from knowing that his mother's body is at rest, and perhaps he'll be finally able to enter that den again, even if it does take some force of will to get past the memory-induced hesitation or reluctance.
Yes, it is, and always will be, a sensitive subject. And it is very far from what Kein was expecting. For a good while, he /can't/ respond, but from the very second he hears her news, what he feels is... Well, beyond his ability to describe, but certainly not negative. She doesn't have to say it. He knows what kind of trouble they must have gone through to do what they did. It is something he never would have been able to do, if only because he would have been overcome upon seeing her. But they did it, and he has no doubt that at least some of the reason they did it was for him. All thoughts of his own news temporarily gone from his mind, he closes his eyes and takes a couple deep, if ragged, breaths, before he finally feels like he can keep control of his voice. "Thank you." He speaks quietly, and his voice is full of emotion. Sorrow, yes... But also relief, love, and gratitude.
Most likely not to same extent that Kein is, but Nayeli is also relieved, and this because Kein seems genuinely appreciative of what she's done. At his simple words of gratitude, she leans closer and gives him a lick on the cheek, but keeps her maw up by his ear. "She'd be so proud of you and what you've become, as am I." It'd be an interesting comparison to see who loves Kein more. But can such a comparison even be made? It's an entirely different relationship, and Nayeli isn't sure that she'd even want to try such a thing. All she knows is that she loves her mate with absolute certainty, and it is definitely a relief to know that her actions did indeed have the desired results.
Funny, that Kasim said almost the same thing earlier. Kein has done very well at handling his grief on his own time, so that he can be the strong mate that he thinks Nayeli wants when they are together, but at hearing that his mother has been put to rest... And put to rest here, close to where they are... That he can finally visit her resting place... Well, it's harder to ignore, now. He forces himself to take another deep breath before he speaks, but his voice is still weaker than it was seconds ago. "I wish... I just miss her. So much." No different than how Nayeli feels about her own parents, he's certain. No different than how Kasim must feel. Kein has no right to force his mourning onto them, and there is no one else he could talk to about it.
Yes, she does indeed miss her parents. But can Nayeli compare her grief to Kein's? It's certainly not the first time that she feels immensely guilty for not being closer to her mother, let alone her father. Can she blame their wandering and seeming disinterest in her for that? Of course not. "I know you do, and I miss her as well. All of us do." She sighs, nuzzling at his neck. Of course they don't miss her nearly as much as Kein, but it's the best consolation she can offer.
As soon as he's able... As soon as everyone leaves this area, he will have to come here by himself. Kein knows this. And he knows that as soon as he does, as soon as he gives himself the chance to visit her and say goodbye... It will hurt, but then he can finally start to really heal, instead of just his current getting better at hiding it. Now is not that time, though. For now, he just moves so that he can lie down beside Nayeli, pressing himself against her once he does. Regardless of what he might be feeling in this moment, this really is one of the most meaningful things she has ever done for him, and he loves her immensely for it.
Nayeli has made it a point to avoid the area where her own parents died; she doesn't even want to think if there's anything left of their bodies other than bones, assuming the scavengers have found them. And even though some might think it a fitting end for her father, she certainly isn't going to agree with that. As Kein lies down, she does the same, beginning to purr softly again. If he wants to pursue conversation with her, she's more than willing to do so, but if he wants to just be together with her, lost in his memories and thoughts, then that's fine as well. She can be a good shoulder to lean on as well as a listening ear, yep!
Kein doesn't speak for a long while. It takes him time to sort his thoughts. He remains pressed against Nayeli, though. When he finally does speak, his voice is not quite back to normal, but he is much calmer, more relaxed, than he was immediately after Nayeli spoke. "They were going to try to have more cubs. Mom told me right before you and I left." Was his mother already pregnant when Chesmu killed her? Should he be mourning his unborn siblings along with his mother? He'll never know, and it's not the type of thing he would ever ask Kasim, but... Whether his Mom was pregnant at the time of her death or not, those cubs /did/ exist, even if only his, Mom's, and Kasim's minds.
"New brothers and sisters.." Nayeli breathes, thinking of how wonderful that could've been for Kein. And if it hadn't been for the senseless rape and murder of his mother, no doubt it would have happened, and Kein might even have a sister again. The Matron can't help but sigh, wondering yet again if she should feel bitter for what her father did. "It's kind of scary to think that unless something new happens, you and I are going to be the only parents in the entire tribe."
Kein gives a nod of his head. Yes, it is kind of scary, but... They'll have plenty of help, he knows. "Nayeli... Kasim will be staying here... I don't think he'll ever have another chance at having his own cubs, but... We can give him grandchildren." There are many reasons why Kein wants Kasim to be the one his cubs know as their grandfather, but this is the line of thought his brain has taken. Of course, given that she /is/ already pregnant, there should be no question as to what he is proposing.
So he /is/ staying. Nayeli does feel some sense of relief, as even though her relationship to the older male is still somewhat awkward, especially after Maulisho's death, she knows that it'll be good for Kein to have the support of his adopted father. Once again, she's reminded of how much she needs to talk to Kasim one-on-one and resolve anything and everything that may or may not be between them. Her biggest fear is that Kasim doesn't see her as a worthy mate for his adopted son, or even a worthy Matron for the tribe. "I'm glad he'll still be here," she answers simply. Perhaps not as glad as Kein is, but she /is/ happy, nonetheless.
If Kein knew she has those fears, he would do everything he could to help her set them aside. Kasim has never expressed doubt if Nayeli's worthiness. Kein never would have expected that he would. That is not what is on the male's mind, though. Apparently, though, he was not clear enough. "I know you were upset that I didn't tell you the truth about Azriel... And I don't want to suggest that we make a habit of lying to our cubs, but..." Would Kein be happier if he didn't know about Azriel? Probably. "I really want them to have one loving grandparent, Nayeli."
"And what happens when they learn the truth? What if they get even more upset than I was?" The words are out almost before Nayeli is aware that she's responding. She's not angry or upset; her tone reflects the wariness and hesitation that she's feeling. Yes, it would be a very difficult thing to tell the cubs the truth. And yes, it would also be a very difficult thing to tell them what they both know is a deliberate lie, no matter how much Kein wants to call Kasim his real father. "I'm sorry," Nayeli says, sighing. "I shouldn't have said that."
Kein is not surprised by how she receives what he says... Which is not to say that it doesn't upset him, to some degree. He is determined not to respond in anger, though. He looks away from her, but he doesn't move away. Though he knows how /not/ to respond, he can't figure out how /to/ respond. In part, it's because she's right, but... Kein was far more upset by the truth than by the fact that it took his mother so long to tell him. Finally, quietly, he says, "No, it's... Well, you had reason to say what you did..." Just like Kein had reason, very good reason, to bring this up.
He's right, but he hasn't exactly answered her concerns. Perhaps they both just need time to think it over. Certainly they can get advice from Paoro or from Kasim, but the decision will ultimately be theirs to make. What if they strongly disagree? Nayeli knows that sooner or later something will come up that they can't agree on. What then? They'll just have to deal with that when it comes. But for now, she's silent, leaning a bit into Kein as she knows he's feeling upset.
Kein is quiet for a while longer, mostly just trying to decide where he should go from here. He shouldn't sleep without telling Nayeli about that wolf, and he did promise Kasim he could do what he could, not just bring it up and then drop it. Finally, Kein takes a deep breath. She was the one who got upset because she wasn't told about Azriel immediately, so... "I will respect whatever you decide, Nayeli, but... Kasim is much more of a father to me than Azriel could ever be. I didn't understand that when my mother told me, because... Well, because children don't understand things like that. I'm not saying we should never tell them. Only that we should wait to decide when to tell them, and that I don't see a reason why Kasim can't be known as their grandfather in the meantime." That's probably as calmly as he could say it, and now he is prepared to let it rest. "Just... Think about it, okay? If you decide the risk of upsetting them is too great, then I'll understand."
"Of course I will think about it," Nayeli tries to convince and comfort her friend as best as she's able. She can't promise anything on what the outcome will be, but whichever way she decides, she'll definitely keep Kein's thoughts on the matter in perspective. "There are so many things we'll have to figure out.. what to tell the cubs, how to tell the cubs, when to tell the cubs.." She trails off with somewhat of a wistful smile. "I think the hardest part will be teaching them how to talk. If you think about it, how /do/ you teach that? Just talk to them, I guess..."
Kein doesn't really remember how his mother spoke to him when he was just learning to talk. He knows how she taught him words, but how to speak? "I think that's something they just learn by example." At least, he /hopes/ that's something they learn by example, because otherwise, his cubs may well grow up never being able to talk.
Nayeli nods slowly, pondering his words. "I'm sure they'll pick up running and wrestling and pouncing and all that pretty easily." But how easily will things like talking and thinking come? She has to admit to herself that she's deathly afraid of the possibility that one of her cubs might go completely crazy the way her father did. Or even worse, the thought of Kein doing that. Paoro didn't really offer much of an explanation of why it happened, so what's to say it couldn't happen again?
Kein has no idea what might be on Nayeli's mind. At what she says, he smiles, quite certain that he learned how to wrestle before he learned how to talk, or at least before he learned to talk well. "I wonder how many there will be and... What they'll be." Though he hasn't given it much thought yet... Kein has to admit to himself that he is especially concerned about what traits his sons, if he has any, might inherit. It he would admit, for even the slightest moment, that his mother, mate, and his mate's mother and grandmother have any negative qualities, he would still argue that they are dwarved by the good qualities those females possess. He, Azriel, and Chesmu, on the other paw...
Is there even any way to tell how many cubs she might be carrying? She certainly doesn't feel any heavier, or at least not that she can easily notice. "I hope that.. they're all born okay." Perhaps she's a bit biased, given that she's the one who'll be giving birth, but she really /does/ want them to be born healthy and without any complications. Nayeli falls silent, purring and leaning some more into Kein, relishing the feeling of his warm body pressed up against hers. Even the daunting intimidation of childbirth doesn't seem quite as bad knowing that her mate will be supporting her through it all. Though, from what she's heard, males are supposed to stay away during the actual event. Why she would want Kein to not be there with her is something she can't possibly imagine, but perhaps Paoro would be able to explain it for her.
Who wouldn't want everything to be okay? The birthing process, and his cubs. What if something is physically wrong with one of them, or...? Kein sighs and pushes the thought away, then nuzzles against Nayeli as he says, "Everything will be okay." Kein might recognize something going wrong as a possibility, but at least his mother and Ayashe never had any problems that he knows about, so there isn't that added fear there.
If only she could be absolutely confident that Kein's words will be true. But the various 'what-if?' scenarios will no doubt be running through her head for a long time; her goal will be to minimize them to the point of non-issues. Nayeli doesn't say anything in response to Kein's words, but continues purring and pressing into him. That should be response enough, as words simply would not do justice for her current state of emotion and affection for Kein.
Kein is content to just lie beside Nayeli for a while, enjoying his mate's company. THey may not have resolved anything, and he would not be surprised if it is a while before they do, but at least he knows they can talk about these things without letting their own issues get in the way of them communicating. He doesn't want to push it off until they are both too tired to talk about the situation, though, so, after a few minutes, he says, "There is one other thing. I ran into another wolf, a little bit ago." Surely, they did not come this often when he was a cub.
No, they indeed did not. Not even while Kein and his family were away from Amaranth. "A third wolf?" Nayeli doesn't even try to hide the surprise in her voice. "Trespassing again, or just near the border?" Why the sudden incursion of lupines? Is something happening that's making the mountain a viable location to travel to? It's not as if their boundaries aren't clearly marked, so there really is no excuse for ignorance as opposed to deliberate trespassing, whether because of malice, mischievous, or just simply not caring.
"Trespassing. Not far from here." The entire encounter was far more relaxed than the situation with Hinto, though, and Kein continues speaking. "She claims she has been here before, that she is a friend... And she wants to stay this time. Her and two others." Kein does not speak too quickly, does not try to fit absolutely everything the wolf said in before Nayeli can get a word in.
Three wolves wanting to stay in Amaranth? Whatever happened to their packlands down around the base of the mountain and surrounding territories? Nayeli's initial reaction is decidedly negative; with cubs due to be born in only a matter of weeks, does she really want three /wolves/ here on their mountain? Even one wolf would make her uneasy, as she doesn't have the knowledge and experience with their kind that Kein does. Even if this wolf claims that she is a friend, can they really trust her? Should they really trust her, especially once there are young and helpless cubs that need protection? "It's.. your decision, Chieftain. You know wolves far better than I do, and our safety is your responsibility, and I know you don't take that lightly."
If Kein were less concerned about the safety of the members of his tribe, he might have allowed the wolf to stay immediately, because as much as he is concerned with their safety, he also recognizes that they should be compassionate to others, when they can. "She says they were driven away from their home by cougars to the north. It might be my choice to make... And I don't think she was lying, or that she's a threat... But I wasn't going to let her stay here before talking to you, and maybe Paoro." Maybe Paoro would be better able to confirm the wolf's story than Nayeli. If everything the wolf said was true, she would have last been here about six months ago, and there's no guarantee Nayeli would remember, if the two ever even met.
The chances of this being the wolf that Nayeli did meet a long time ago are next to nothing, so she doesn't even consider that as a possibility. The Matron is more concerned with hearing of wolves being driven away by cougars. The last thing she wants to worry about is getting caught up in a conflict, especially when one of the parties are their own kind. Of course, it's also entirely possible that the two cougars are Azriel and a mate, and in which case she would be more than happy to assist any who are opposed to him. "This is something I've never heard of happening before, so I agree--it will be important to get Paoro's input on this."
"Perhaps we could look for her together, come morning. We have a couple days, but... I don't want to put it off." Kein is not exactly nervous about talking to the shamaness without his mate there. Not really. Most of the reason he suggests they look for Paoro together is just so they can spend some time together. They haven't managed much of that in the past few days.
"And there's no way to know how long it will take us to find the shamaness," Nayeli adds, even with the knowledge that Paoro has all but guaranteed that she'll be staying in Amaranth territory from now on. "Do you think it would be possible to meet these wolves before we talk to Paoro? I'd like to at least get a feeling of what their intentions might be. Not that I don't trust your judgment, of course," she corrects herself hastily, "but it would be nice to at least get to meet them before a decision is made."
"Of course." If Nayeli were worried about his judgement, she wouldn't have originally said it was his choice to make. Kein is, in no way, worried that she doesn't trust him. Quickly, though, he adds, "I don't think they're all wolves, though... The wolf said she was traveling with dogs. I've never heard of them before." His life has not been so sheltered as Nayeli's, but he knows nothing of the domesticated and feral species that live far to the north of here.
Dogs? What are those? If Nayeli was feeling hesitant before, now she's /really/ feeling reluctant. It's one thing to let a wolf not only onto Amaranth land, but to actually /live/ here... and now two others of a species that she's never even heard of? Yes, she definitely wants to meet them now. "When can we meet them? And.. I'm assuming it will be safe without having to take others with us?" Surely Kein would have discerned that much during their first encounter?
"It will be safe. I believe Nium intends to stay with them until we make a decision. I don't think they could provide a risk even to the two of us, but with Nium there as well..." No, there is no danger, or at least minimal danger, or Kein would be a good deal more reluctant about leading Nayeli to where the wolf and dogs are waiting. "I don't see any reason why we can't just go in the morning." She does want to see them before speaking to Paoro, after all.
The female smiles and rubs her head up against Kein. "Maybe you can get Kasim to take care of the patrol for the day? Then we can not only talk to the three and perhaps find Paoro as well, but have the rest of the day to ourselves." Surely there's nothing wrong with that, right? Nayeli doesn't think Kasim would mind, and even if he does, well.. Kein'll just have to be persuasive then, yep!
Yes, because being perspective worked really well today. Regardless, Kein nods slightly. "I will ask him." Even though Kein won't have particularly good news for the older male, he doesn't think Kasim would mind. "He was going to sleep when I left him earlier, though, so that will have to wait for tomorrow as well." It's shaping up to be a rather busy day, to say the least.
Busy day.. how about a busy week? It's starting to sink in just how little she knows about being diplomatic to new species, especially with one of them being one that she's never even /heard/ of before! But with Kein there, she's sure that it'll go just fine. Nayeli is more concerned with making sure that Amaranth as a whole is portrayed in a positive light, especially since it seems that cougars already have a bad reputation with these three. "Why do you think they came to us? If they're running from cougars, why seek sanctuary with more of the same? Why not seek shelter in a wolfpack or a dog.. pack?" Do dogs even have packs?
Kein rests against Nayeli, now, slowly lowering his head. He doesn't expect to sleep immediately, but it does feel good to finally rest after everything that has happened today. "I don't know. If the wolf... Skelaghe... was telling the truth, maybe we're the only group she knew, or the closest." There are plenty of explanations, he's sure.
So what happens if they agree, and the pursuing cougars come after them? Nayeli can't imagine how she's supposed to explain to other cougars that while wolves and dogs are welcome to stay in Amaranth land, other cougars aren't. Is that really a wise decision to make? She's still not even sure if she believes this wolf who claims to be a friend of the tribe. Nayeli only remembers ever seeing one wolf in Amaranth territory before, and she definitely doesn't recall either of her parents ever talking about friendly relations with wolves. "I guess we'll find out tomorrow." And though her mind wants to stay active with all of the possibilities that could arise from this decision, she forces herself to slow down and try and fall asleep. Tomorrow will come, and they can face those decisions with rested bodies and minds.
What kind of message would it send if they turned away animals only seeking a place to rest while accepting animals who would not only drive animals from their homes, but also track them for whatever distance even once they left? Kein truly is leaning in favor of allowing Skelaghe and her companions to stay, but he is not terribly worried about it, for now. with a smile, he moves his head enough to give Nayeli a light nuzzle, then says, "Sleep well."