Post by Pavane on Oct 15, 2011 20:30:45 GMT -5
Skahla - Male Wolf, Ute Alpha
Wachiwa - Female Wolf
Ikuna - Male Juvenile Wolf
---Hilltop Vista---
Before the incident with the abducted pup, Skahla was often reclusive. Since they have all returned, though, he is even more so. It is just as well for him to let others tend to the den and the social needs of pack creatures, while he... Well, who can say what all Skahla does, these days? He is hardly around any other often enough for the ways he fills his hours to be well known. Hunting has to take up some part of it, though, because as he approaches the den, he does so with a yearling buck, one that in notably intact, save for the broken neck. Skahla cannot exactly be said to be starving, but he is a little leaner than he was before winter hit. Still, he has not nibbled on this catch. There are, after all, lots of mouths to be fed, and that is one of his many responsibilities; responsibilities that he has proven to be ill-suited for.
Ikuna has been looking for his big brother - no, the other one - for a while. He's got an Important Message, after all! So, when Ikuna catches sight of Skahla returning with a deer, he stands up from where he was resting with the other youngsters. They're asleep, but Ikuna... no, he wasn't quite napping. He's not tired enough to be able to manage that right now. He gives himself a shake, fluffing out his winter fur over a body that's slowly recovering bulk, and trots over to meet the Alpha with a wuff hullo.
Wachiwa, laying before the den, is taking a rare moment to sleep while the pups sleep as well. Since returning she's been quiet; perhaps changed some from the incident. It certainly left a mark on her physically; though the cuts upon her head are slowly vanishing, the one across her face, and that sightless eye will always remain. One ear twitches slightly at the sound of a greeting; and she opens both eyes; blue and dead white, slowly. before lifting her head to peer towards Skah and Ikuna, smiling a little. Good. She moves to stand, stretching, before she starts after the pup to try and help Skahla bring the buck closer.
Skahla's pace slows as he spots the pup, making his gait even more awkward than it already was with just dragging his kill back to the den. He is grateful, then, to see Wachiwa close behind Ikuna, although he appears content to leave the carcass where it is for a moment as he releases his hold on its neck and stands upright, somewhat stiffly. He does not manage to greet either his brother or his mate's sister, though. Instead, he simply watches them, with his ears splayed to the sides and his tail limp behind him. Comfortable around his family? Not this young alpha. In fact, he almost feels like a trespasser, here in his own territory.
While Skahla doesn't seem to fit in, Ikuna is just where he belongs. He approaches Skahla with his ears perked, his tail held out even with his back and wagging slightly. His attention is on the wolf, not the deer. "H'lo, Skahla," he says with a smile. "I wanted to tell you something." He looks up, hopeful. That's okay, right? 'Cause... it's important, and so he's gotta tell his alpha. Alphas take care of things!
This reluctance doesn't escape Chewy's attention -- She's always been the kind to notice things. But since she's busy picking up where Skah left off -- catching the deer about the neck and yanking it towards the den the rest of the way -- and since she HOPES what Ikuna is going to say to him is what she told him to report (namely the information about the female wolf who had been involved in things) she lets the two brothers talk for the moment as she drops the deer, then tucks in for her favorite part: working on ripping the ears off the skull.
The young alpha nearly panics as Wachiwa sets to finishing the task he started. How is he meant to distract Ikuna by telling him to go bother Wachiwa when this conversation becomes too uncomfortable, as is bound to happen, if Wachiwa is busy? As much as the thought makes Skahla want to beg off talking to Ikuna, he swallows his nerves and looks back to his brother. "Um. Okay." Ah, eloquent as always, our Skahla. After speaking, he manages to make himself sit in an attempt to convince probably himself more than anyone else that he's not going to do what he wants so greatly to do and run off to be alone some more.
It's that, or about this giant bug he saw once, that thing was HUGE - okay, yes. The female wolf. Ikuna looks up at his brother, tail still slowly wagging... though it hesitates a little from the combination of Skah's obvious nervousness and... well, the thing he has to talk about. Still not the happiest of memories. "When... the bird took me," he starts, and then takes a big breath. "It was away from the den, because there was a wolf and she knew my name and tricked me and I followed her there. I dunno who she was, but maybe you do." It's a little scattered and tumbled-together, and he really really hopes it's the right stuff to say, because Skahla looks kinda unhappy and he's all important 'cause he's the alpha and Ikuna doesn't want to mess up, because this is important too.
Yup, good. Good boy, Ikuna. Wachiwa uses a paw to pin the deer's head down as she yanks and gnaws. A sharp rip results in the ears being pulled off, and then Chewy starts in on the throat, thinking maybe she'd take the head too-- but she listens, as well. To give Ikuna courage should he need it, and to give him encouragement should he also need it, looking up from the deer to watch the two.
This is an important thing, isn't it? And appropriately, Skahla's ears perk as he listens, after which his eyes narrow in thought. It's true, he does know every female in the pack. Everyone who should know young Ikuna's name. But even so, he cannot begin to imagine who would have done such a thing, because... why would they? "You're sure about this, Ikuna?" It's really just a stall for time while Skahla thinks, but no matter how much time he buys himself... he doesn't have an answer, and that isn't a comforting idea in the slightest.
The sound of Chewy gnawin' off those ears is kinda a comfort all on its own. Life, proceeding as it should be. Ikuna keeps his attention up his brother, though, and nods firmly. "Yeah! She said Ikuna, an' she said that Tala was hurt so I had to come," insists the boy. He remembers! This isn't some crazy puppy-dream, he's a big boy now! He continues, almost defiantly, "She was kinda slender, and had white fur all over except it was sorta yellow on top of her muzzle and on her back it was yellow too, kinda almost brown there but mostly she was white."
Ears lay back, listening to Ikuna, because Chewy is still annoyed at this. How dare some strange wolf put one of the pups in danger, and for what? Who knows. She narrows her eyes, but doesn't speak up just yet, as she gnaws on the throat of the deer, and then begins chewing at the flesh, too. She rips a good hunk of meat off, and begins gnawing it down, as she listens, before she finally lifts her head, and, moving her precious ears away from the carcass, starts towards the two brothers, speaking softly. "Ikuna, that's very brave of you-- To want to help your sister. It's not your fault this wolf lead you astray," she says, softly, smiling at him, before looking to Skahla. "And now that your brother knows, he can work on finding her so we can ask why she did this. Hopefully it wasn't a malicious thing-- perhaps the bird was threatening to take one of her own pups unless she found another. In which case, she deserves punishment, but not severe."
A horrible thought occurs to Skahla. He is not as social as a wolf should be, and a wolf who would know his brother and possibly want to protect her own pup by offering up a parentless one instead? Thankfully, before he can get too far down that line of thought, he is capable of getting some mental image of Lupin, who is certainly... well, white, partially, but not at all yellow. Right? "Yes. I'll... look into it." As much as it worries him, what he might find, and so in an attempt to bring conversation away from this female wolf, Skahla adds, "But there is something much more important that I hope you, and the other pups, have learned from this, and that is that you don't go anywhere without adults you can trust, right?" Then there's no worry to begin with, since if all of the young wolves obey that, there should be no situation in which one of the pups is called upon to play saviour to another.
Ikuna nods when Chewy tells him it was brave, though he still kind of frowns. Of course he wanted to help, but... he was kind of stupid, too, because he went with a wolf he didn't know. Didn't everyone tell him not to trust strangers? Being brave _is_ good, but he needs to be not-stupid, too. At the mention of a possible motivation for the she-wolf, he does perk an ear and tilt his head a little. "She did say something about a deal," he says consideringly. Maybe... the wolf was just trying to help her family. Like he was helping Tala. Didn't... didn't the bad wolf say that Tala was safe /now/, right before the bird took Ikuna? All this about motivations makes for an extra scoop of confusion on top. So, when Skah reminds him to be careful, the young wolf just sort of nods and murmurs, "Yeah," still partway lost in his thoughts.
Chewy smiles, leaning down to nuzzle at the younger wolf's shoulders. It's not much of a stretch; the boy is almost as big as she had been two years before. "Don't worry about mistakes. We all make them. Remember the story I told you about Asku and the snake." She smiles Then looks to Skahla; she can kind of tell he's not sure what to do. Far be it to her to tell her alpha what he should do.. but she has a suggestion, soft voiced: "The pups are getting old enough now, Skahla, maybe we should start including them in pack duties, so they can learn how we take care of them." She smiles a bit, "And so they can learn to take care of themselves, too."
Skahla turns her gaze to Wachiwa when the female speaks again, and when he responds, he manages to live up to his reputation of being grumpy. "If they're old enough to start taking on such responsibilities, they're old enough to learn what mistakes can cost them, and it certainly is the sort of thing they should worry about. Like Ikuna learned." Not that Skahla seems to blame his brother for what Ikuna's mistake caused not only himself, but also the others in the pack. Notably Wachiwa, who sustained the worst injuries in that battle. He is not of a mind, though, to hobble these pups by implying that life is anything other than difficult and dangerous.
"I'll... think about that too. About ways they can start to help," the alpha adds, by way of trying to soften what he says. After all, he has never had any objections to Wachiwa's optimistic views before. Especially not back when it was him she was trying to cheer up with them.
Ikuna relaxes a little at Chewy's touch, and his tail gives a brief wag. He nods to her reminder that it's okay to make mistakes... even if he does still feel bad about some of his. Especially how she got hurt from that bird. His ears splay a bit as what Skah says. "I learned. I'm gonna do better next time, but I can't make it un-happen," he says with a small scowl that's as much for himself as anyone else. Up his ears perk again, when Chewy talks to Skahla about getting them involved. That's definitely something the pups want! "Asku said he'd help teach us, if you said it was okay," he tells his brother. There's a little white lie there - he's not /entirely/ sure Asku was planning on asking before starting those lessons, but it's more or less true. Anyway, it's still a far leap from having lessons to actually going on patrols or hunting anything bigger than mice. It's a start, though.
A smirk, and Wachiwa reminds, "We were making grave mistakes when we were their age, too, Skahla. We survived. We became better for them, because we learned. I think the pups have learned well, especially Ikuna, from this. To listen to their elders, to never accept what one person has said when it is suspect. Do not be so grave with him. Give them the chance to prove they have learned. The only ones at fault here have already been punished to the most severity, and only the Great Spirits can punish them further now." She moves from Ikuna's side to Skahla's, giving her alpha a nuzzle to the cheek, chin, and shoulder. "And you. You have learned too... haven't you, Skahla. That a leader's place is not hiding from his pack, but standing among them, yes?" She's actually checking this out here; trying to see what Skah will do.
Before Skahla gets a chance to assure Ikuna that, at least, no one expects him to undo what happened, Wachiwa is nuzzling against him, and it's a gesture he willingly accepts and, yes. Even returns. Because despite his self-induced solitude, he craves social interaction like any wolf does. With a deep breath, he says, "I'm there when it matters, aren't I?" Well, no. He isn't. If he were, he would have been there when Ikuna was taken, to prevent it. All the same... "I'm doing my best, Chewy. Really, I am." It's just that his best may not always involve him being in close quarters with wolves around whome he has yet to feel comfortable, since assuming his father's role in the pack. With a glance to his brother, Skahla says, "I'm gonna tell you to do something I always hated hearing when I was your age, yeah? Do as I say, not as I do; you listen to Wachiwa closely, because she's smart." Skahla, on the other hand, is an unstable hothead who is still trying to feel comfortable in his own skin,
Ikuna looks up at Chewy and Skahla as they speak to each other, watching that interaction with the open curiosity of a youngster. When Skah directs his attention once more toward Ikuna, the boy perks his ears and tilts his head to listen. Right, important lesson. Do as... aww, come on. Not with the... wait, is that all? Well, DUH. Of course Chewy's smart. She's pretty much one of the smartest wolves ever, because how else would she know all those stories and have answers for all those puppy questions? Seriously, like that needs saying? His incredulousness shows in his face as he grins and nods.
There's a sudden grin despite the grim discussion; and Wachiwa takes a moment to quickly attempt to tug at Skah's ears, laughing. "You never would have said that when I was his age," she teases at Skah. She'll neveer grow up man, never. With the silly moment passed, she adds, softly, "You are doing your best, Skahla. But you seem to think your best is not good enough. You seem... Distant. You've been aloof.." .. She pauses. Now might be a good time to -- "Ikuna, why don't you go eat something? You're still a growing body after all," she winks the good eye at the pup, then turns to Skahla. "... I want to talk adult talk with your brother a moment anyway, and it'll only bore you."
And there goes Skahla's attempt to slip away clean, like he'd implied he was going to do. As though he needed any more proof that Wachiwa has gotten too smart for her own good... or at least, for his. He waits, patiently, for Ikuna to follow Wachiwa's instructions, before he says, "What if it will bore me too? Does that mean I can go away, now?" The alpha really does mean it only as a joke, though he doesn't hold out much hope for it managing to soften what is bound to be an intensely uncomfortable conversation... just like, oh, any heartfelt conversation he has ever had in his entire life. Wachiwa is, after all, not the only one who has been reluctant to grow up and forced to do so too soon.
Ikuna is right at that age where he isn't sure if adult talk is incredibly boring or strangely fascinating. Still, he only hesitates a few moments before nodding obediently to Chewy. "Okay," he says, and turns around to go trot over to that deer for something to eat. Growing he most certainly is, and filling in the crevices from when he didn't have enough. He pads over to the deer, and looks over it before starting to bite and tug, his paws braced on its belly. Big fierce wolf! Grawr! He's gonna eat that deer so good! Yeah, it's a pretty good distraction, as it turns out. At least for the moment.
And once Ikuna is out of direct earshot, Chewy sits, and looks to Skahla with an expression of softness. "... He suffers from what we suffer from now, too, you know. He's lost his innosence. All the pups have, except maybe Hinto's. But it's not the pups I'm worried about, Skahla. It's you. You.. have been... Avoiding people. The pack. None of us hate you, you know that, right? We all feel the loss of your mother and father even now. But you... Weren't ready for this. It's.. okay, you know? it's okay to be afraid, or feel uncomfortable.. But.. don't let it distance you from the people you love, and who love you." She smiles weakly.
The smile that Skahla gives back to Wachiwa has little humour in it. Mostly, it seems bitter, as he holds onto grudges that have had long months to fester. "I know you don't hate me. And I want to keep it that way." Because, as they say, familiarity breeds contempt" This may be especially true in Skahla's case, as the young alpha still has strange ways about him. Ways that he does his best to keep hidden, so as to not cause other to doubt his ability to lead the pack. Allowing his smile to soften slightly, he says, "A pack doesn't need two alphas to be so involved with everyone. Let your sister be the one everyone loves." Spirit know, she still has a place in his heart, even if he has been so withdrawn that he has no way of knowing she may well have done the same.
A smirk comes from Wachiwa, "We still like to see both alphas from time to time, you know. To make sure you haven't run off and abandoned us." A playfu nudge of paw comes to his own, as she grins to her 'brother-in-law', before she adds, "I could never hate you anyway, Skah. You know me," she teases, before she considers. "Speaking of Shawnee.. How are things going between you two..? Are you.. doing well? Will there be more pups for me to watch this spring?" She asks, playfully, trying to lighten the mood some.
"I wouldn't count on it. And maybe it's for the best, you know? They're still growing anyway, and... well, there's Lupin's pups, and..." And if they were planning on having pups, it is well past time they should have spoken about it. Or spoken about anything, really, but speaking to each other... is really not what Shawnee and Skahla do best. Not since they became alphas, anyway. Besides, Skahla has no idea how to be a father, and he knows that Shawnee doesn't have much idea of how to be a mother. With all the tending to his parents' children, Wachiwa would be a much better option to give the pack a spring litter than he and Shawnee would, wouldn't she?
"Aw," Chewy says, deflating a little, "But I so wanted to tease Shawnee about puppy weight!" She gives Skahla as serious a face as shew can for that.. but it doesn't last long. She giggles amusedly, then nudges at his shoulder with her paw again. "It's okay, Skah, it's.. a lot to think about, being the leader of a pack. I know you two will work it out in time. If we go a year or two without new blood, then so be it. Better for you two not to be stressed." She smiles, then nudges at him again comfortingly with her snout this time. "Besides. Eventually you two will have the neices and nephews I can spoil and turn against you to my heart's content. I can wait." She winks.
"I knew there had to be something sinister you were plotting, Chewy." And who knows. Maybe by next winter, someone will have stepped into the role of beta properly, and Skahla can push the responsibility of having pups onto that wolf. It seems a brilliant idea as the young alpha nuzzles against Wachiwa. "You just keep looking after the pups, and don't worry about anything. Especially me. I'll... take care of the other things, and they need you more than they need anyone else." Certainly more than they need Skahla about, all scowly and moody like he is.
"I dunno. Pups need a good father figure around. If it wasn't for your father, I think I never would have learned a lot of things." Smirks Chewy softly, as she takes lightly to chewing a bit at his fur, in a friendly manner. "You could teach them things. How to hunt, how to patrol the borders. How to look all angry and stern when I know you're really just a ball of cuddlefluff inside." Another tease, but good hearted; chewy has never been good with insulting because she's just so.. happy. She then smiles a bit, and nods toward the carcass and Ikuna. "Your brothers could use guidance in how to become good wolves. I can handle your sisters... But boys need boys once in a while. Besides." She pauses, then, leaning away a bit, she adds, "I am /so/ not handling the 'where puppies come from' when it comes time to tell them more than just 'your parents wished to make something that was a little bit of a both of them' part."
Skahla gives Wachiwa a skeptical look that requires no acting, but that also isn't based on any of her light-hearted teasing. "You said it yourself, Chewy. They need a /good/ father figure around. Make Asku do it. They're fond of him, aren't they?" Plus, what Skahla knows, he figured out largely on his own, and from getting a solid paw across his nose when he got a little too careless about where he was sniffing. No reason his siblings should learn any differently, because Skahla is no more keen than Wachiwa to have those sorts of talks than he was to get them, when he was younger.
"... I hate to tell you this, but, your brother's not exactly father material either." Smirks Chewy in thought. "Spirits know I love him, but... He's too quick to anger... And when Ikuna was gone, I was afraid he would snap at anyone and everyone because of it. Not that it wasn't his right, Ikuna is his little brother too, but.. Level heads would have been better." She sighs, considering how she, too, had failed in levelheadedness at least a few times. ".. Still. You should be around for them when they grow. If not as a father figure, than so they know their Alpha isn't some mystical, omnipotent thing. So they know you, too, are capable of feelings like they are. So they don't think 'I'm not allowed to be sad because Skahla is never sad', or 'Skahla is never happy, I must have done something wrong.'" She pauses, then whispers, "They're afraid of you enough already, Skah. Do you want to turn into 'Old Man Skahla' with the grouchy and the 'Run away he's coming!'?"
Skahla's brow furrows again as Wachiwa speaks, and there is hardly any hesitation at all before he asks, as quietly, "They're afraid of me?" Oh, sure. There were times he was afraid of his father. And his mother, for that matter. It's definitely never something he wanted from his younger siblings, though. And why should they be afraid of /him/? What has he ever done to them, besides be in perhaps the occasional foul mood when they were nearby. Oh... Frowning, Skahla looks at Ikuna and his sleeping companions.
Ikuna chooses that moment for his head to emerge from chewing on tasty, tasty deer. He licks his muzzle - then pauses, mid-lap, as he notices Skahla looking at him. He offers a hesitant wag of his tail, looking back at his elder brother, and then his eyes flick over to Chewy as though to ask why and make sure everything is still all right.
A nod, confidential, as Chewy says, "They think you're always angry at them, and everyone in the pack. I've explained to them that's just your way.. But maybe, once in a while, if you took time out to teach them things, or play with them, they'd see." She smiles a little, "After all. They may almost be adults.. But so are we, and we still need to take time out once in a while to play or just talk. Or even just be there for someone." She nuzzles at his shoulder again, and smiles. ".. Truth be told, I had to coax Ikuna into telling you about the she-wolf because he was afraid you'd hate him for what he did. I told him we would be angrier at the she-wolf for tricking him than we would at him for going, and that he should tell you so we can make sure he's safe."
Nevermind that Skahla was not today, nor has he ever been, terribly keen on speaking to his brother. It still bothers the alpha to find out that his sibling have to be coaxed into talking to him. It's a more convincing argument that he really needs to be spending time with them than anything else ever could be. "Well... maybe... you know, one at a time..." Maybe then it wouldn't be quite so bad. And knowing that Ikuna is apparently so frightened of him at least encourages Skahla to force the frown from his muzzle as the younger male continues looking in their direction.
As Skahla's expression grows less dour, Ikuna's wag becomes less hesitant. Okay. He flashes a smile, then lowers his head for another bite. He's pretty well full, though, and so after another couple nibbles he turns from the deer and trots aside a few steps. What now? Chewy and Skahla still look to be in the throes of that Serious Adult Conversation, so he can't go back there. Boring or not, he's pretty sure he's not supposed to be listening to it.
"That's a good start. Give them all one on one time with you, so they can see you aren't some great and powerful frowny face." She smiles. Chewy then watches Ikuna, and adds, "Why not start with him now? Ikuna, I mean. Tell him a story, or teach him how to look gruff so that he can scare prey." She grins, and then adds, "Or even teach him on the deer the best place to bite for a quick and kind kill."
Now? Like... now, now? Skahla's frown almost returns, but after a moment, the alpha gives a small nod. He has no excuse not to get started now, so... "Ikuna? Can you come here?" Oh, this isn't going to be at all pleasant. Especially not now that he knows his youngest brother is so reluctant to speak with him. While waiting for Ikuna to wander over, Skahla stands. Because if the two of them must have some kind of terribly awkward interaction... it must be for the best that it doesn't happen where everyone in Ute, or just those in the area immediately surrounding the den, can witness it.
Just a nice, unthreatening little wolf. That's all, right? Ikuna continues his look around for something to do. His friends still seem to be asleep, and while he's not going to go and wake them up, he doesn't really want to join them right now either. He's had enough of trying to rest. When his name is called, he perks up his ears, and trots on over, looking up questioningly at Skahla. "Uh-huh?" he asks. It's probably more admonitions about how to be safe or something. It does seem like Chewy's right, that Skah is just... worried. And grumpy about it.
A smirk, as Chewy leans in to nuzzle at Skah's shoulder. "You'll do /fine/," she says, smiling. "Your mother would be proud of you, and so would your father. Just.. think about it like when you were young." She smiles, then stands, and starts trotting back towards the den, pausing as she passes Ikuna to murmur, "It'll be fine, you'll see. You'll have fun." She smiles, gives him a lick to his back, and then completes her journey to the deer, whee she begins ripping off chunks to drag down to the others hiding from the cold.
"We're going to just... go on a little walk together, okay?" Yeah, sure. This will be fine, and not at all traumatising. Well, for the pup, that might prove to be true. Skahla has some serious doubts about whether it will be true for him, though, but it's rather too late to back out of it now. Giving Wachiwa a faint, and force smile, Skahla then turns, as to begin the walk with Ikuna, where, if he is very lucky, the boy will drive the majority of the conversation and keep Skahla from having to do so.
Ikuna nods to Chewy's comment as she steps past him, and wags his tail for a moment. Fun, okay. So maybe it isn't a lecture? He keeps his attention on Skahla, waiting for explanations of this thing called 'fun' according to his elder brother. A walk. "Okay," says Ikuna. He trots forward to a spot by his elder brother's side as Skah turns, looking up at him with a friendly and inquisitive expression. Just waiting for Skahla to say more, as they walk along.
It is some time of walking in perhaps not-so-companionable silence before Skahla manages to think of anything to say, and when he does, he takes one of Wachiwa's suggestions. He can tell stories as well as anyone else, right? And is that not part of what drove him to want to become alpha? To honour the stories he heard about wolves he never met? Of course, none of those stories are coming to mind, just now. It is, apparently, a lot harder than it seems. "So... Ikuna... I mean, that is... Okay. Hi." Maybe he /can't/ tell stories, given that his attempt to start one turns out like that. Skahla is no more comfortable one-on-one with this pup than he was when they're all in a group, though, and the older male's body language betrays that clearly.
Ikuna trots along at Skahla's side, looking up at his elder brother as they walk. His ears perk at every start to conversation, and then fall back when it turns into nothing. The youngster can read Skah's unease pretty clearly, and after a few more moments, he decides to take matters into his own paws. After all, his big Alpha brother isn't the scariest thing he's ever met, right? He's probably not even the scariest thing Ikuna has made friends with. Yeah, that cougar was only a cub, but still. So! He starts a conversation. "What's it like being an Alpha? I know it means being in charge and takin' care of everybody, but what's it like?"
There we go. A question. Something he can answer. Though it's not a particularly easy question to answer, it still gives him something to go from, which is greatly appreciated since Wachiwa is not here, with her neverending ideas for conversation. "It's... not what I ever thought it would be. My... that is, our... our parents always made it look so easy. So natural. But it's just..." Not the sort of thing that a pup, even one who has experienced the sorts of things Ikuna has experienced, should worry about. "Well, what do you think it would be like, hmm?"
Ikuna listens carefully to Skah's answer, nodding a little. When the question gets turned back on him, he frowns a little. "I think there'd be lots of worrying," he says, looking out at the ground in front of him instead of up at his brother. He's quiet for a few steps, then adds, "Like how I got worried when Kachina didn' eat, 'cause if she died I'd be all alone. But sometimes I couldn't do anything, 'cause there wasn't even any fish to try an' make her eat. So I just worried."
"Kachina... that was...?" Skahla doesn't finish the question, yet, because though he never did speak with her, he can figure out that it was the young cub they had with them for a time. And since Ikuna has brought it up... "Listen, Ikuna... What I said earlier... Okay, let me say this a different way. How much have you heard about the first alpha of this pack, hmm? The one... I was named after. Me... and my sister. Our sister."
Ikuna keeps on staring at the ground, thinking about all that worrying, until the mention of his name makes him look up. He blinks a litle at the question, and tries to think. Uhm. He ends up just shaking his head. "I dunno... anything, really." Back to being storytime again, perhaps, but at least now there's a story to be told. Ikuna looks up, curiosity edging out the reliving of his memories.
"Skelaghe. I only met her once or twice, when I was really little, and I don't... really remember much. At least, I don't think I do. But Mom... Mom loved her a lot, and we heard a lot about her, when we were growing up. I remember being told, just once... Well, the important part of it is this. Skelaghe was very loved. She had a lot of loyal packmates, even once her mate left. Even when she was all on her own, she was always the alpha of this pack while she was here. But this... this alpha, beloved by all... even she was not perfect, Ikuna. She made mistakes. She got hurt, and sometimes she made those around her hurt. Sometimes, she made Mom hurt." It is hardly the coherant story that others, like Wachiwa, would tell, but the message is there. Skahla heard, when his parents were still alive, Skelaghe spoken of so lovingly, despite all her mistakes. All the pain that some of her actions caused.
Ikuna looks up at Skahla, with those earnest eyes, and those perked ears, and listens to that somewhat story and tries to make sense of it. The beloved alpha - and the maker of mistakes. Hurting people, being hurt, but love through it all. That story, inept as it is, sort of catalyzes another thought, one that's been lurking around in his head. "Mistakes... mistakes still hurt people. Even if they forgive you, it's not okay," he says, his face wrinkled with deep thoughts. "It's not okay, but... sometimes you can't help it. And... if people love you, they forgive you. Even though you hurt them, and that's not okay."
"Yes, that is what I said, isn't it?" That mistakes have consequences, and that the pups need to understand that. "And you're right, Ikuna. It's not okay to cause the ones we care about... to cause them pain." As Skahla should well know, from being on both sides of that process. "You know probably better than some of the adults here that we can never ignore our mistakes. That doing so... may cause something much worse than just someone we love getting a little hurt. We have to be careful. But even with everything I said, Ikuna... it is still important to know that the ones who love us won't stop loving us because we made a mistake. That even someone who made mistakes that got people hurt as one of the most loved animals I've ever heard about. And that... I don't blame you, or expect you to take back your mistake. And that... you really don't have to be afraid of me. You understand all of that, right?" Of course, Skahla's "story" should have a self-serving purpose, because he truly does not want his youngest family members to fear him.
Ikuna nods consideringly. It is what Skahla said, at least... if understood from the right perspective. It's a hard perspective to reach, sometimes. Making mistakes is bad, but it's not the end of the world. Hurting the people you love is bad, but sometimes... you'll still do it. And that doesn't mean you should stop trying, but even when you try your hardest, you'll sometimes fail, and hurt people, and that's _still_ not the end of the world. "I'm not really scared," he says, and it's even sort of true. It's the sort of truth that has a seed and the will to make it grow. "You're my brother." Then he lifts his head up, and offers a nuzzle to his brother's shoulder.
Skahla stops walking when Ikuna nuzzles at him, and after a moment of hesitation, he lowers his head to nose quickly against Ikuna's. "Yes... yes, I am. I'm not like Wachiwa. I can't tell stories." That much is now glaringly obvious. "And I don't... play. Like, you know. The others. But I am your brother, Ikuna... and... I do care for you, you know." Bleh. Honesty. "So, you know... As long as you know that, then..." We never have to speak of it again, Skahla continues silently, in his head.
Ikuna smiles as Skahla accepts his nuzzle, and even returns it. His tail wags gently, and he nods. No, Skahla isn't really a storytelling sort. And... well, it's true that Ikuna hasn't /seen/ him playing, but he's heard about how it used to be. Still, people do change sometimes, so he nods. "I love you too, Skahla," he says with that puppy earnestness. Fortunately, or maybe not, none of the rest of the pack are here to see this moment. He finishes the sentence on his own, "Then I won't be scared, even when we both make mistakes sometimes. Because we're family, an' we love each other."
"Right." Skahla begins walking again, content to have Ikuna believe that's what he meant to say. This whole talking thing... has proven to be as uncomfortable as Skahla imagined it would. "Now. If you and the others are to take on more responsibility, then come. Let me show you the borders of Ute land, okay?"
Ikuna nods, and he trots quickly after his brother to catch up. "Okay." This is important, serious, bigwolf business, and Ikuna wants to learn it all. So he gives it his whole attention, and those mushy thoughts are left behind pretty much entirely. He'll come back to them later... by which time Skahla will probably have safely slipped off elsewhere and won't have to deal with the awkwardness.
Wachiwa - Female Wolf
Ikuna - Male Juvenile Wolf
---Hilltop Vista---
Before the incident with the abducted pup, Skahla was often reclusive. Since they have all returned, though, he is even more so. It is just as well for him to let others tend to the den and the social needs of pack creatures, while he... Well, who can say what all Skahla does, these days? He is hardly around any other often enough for the ways he fills his hours to be well known. Hunting has to take up some part of it, though, because as he approaches the den, he does so with a yearling buck, one that in notably intact, save for the broken neck. Skahla cannot exactly be said to be starving, but he is a little leaner than he was before winter hit. Still, he has not nibbled on this catch. There are, after all, lots of mouths to be fed, and that is one of his many responsibilities; responsibilities that he has proven to be ill-suited for.
Ikuna has been looking for his big brother - no, the other one - for a while. He's got an Important Message, after all! So, when Ikuna catches sight of Skahla returning with a deer, he stands up from where he was resting with the other youngsters. They're asleep, but Ikuna... no, he wasn't quite napping. He's not tired enough to be able to manage that right now. He gives himself a shake, fluffing out his winter fur over a body that's slowly recovering bulk, and trots over to meet the Alpha with a wuff hullo.
Wachiwa, laying before the den, is taking a rare moment to sleep while the pups sleep as well. Since returning she's been quiet; perhaps changed some from the incident. It certainly left a mark on her physically; though the cuts upon her head are slowly vanishing, the one across her face, and that sightless eye will always remain. One ear twitches slightly at the sound of a greeting; and she opens both eyes; blue and dead white, slowly. before lifting her head to peer towards Skah and Ikuna, smiling a little. Good. She moves to stand, stretching, before she starts after the pup to try and help Skahla bring the buck closer.
Skahla's pace slows as he spots the pup, making his gait even more awkward than it already was with just dragging his kill back to the den. He is grateful, then, to see Wachiwa close behind Ikuna, although he appears content to leave the carcass where it is for a moment as he releases his hold on its neck and stands upright, somewhat stiffly. He does not manage to greet either his brother or his mate's sister, though. Instead, he simply watches them, with his ears splayed to the sides and his tail limp behind him. Comfortable around his family? Not this young alpha. In fact, he almost feels like a trespasser, here in his own territory.
While Skahla doesn't seem to fit in, Ikuna is just where he belongs. He approaches Skahla with his ears perked, his tail held out even with his back and wagging slightly. His attention is on the wolf, not the deer. "H'lo, Skahla," he says with a smile. "I wanted to tell you something." He looks up, hopeful. That's okay, right? 'Cause... it's important, and so he's gotta tell his alpha. Alphas take care of things!
This reluctance doesn't escape Chewy's attention -- She's always been the kind to notice things. But since she's busy picking up where Skah left off -- catching the deer about the neck and yanking it towards the den the rest of the way -- and since she HOPES what Ikuna is going to say to him is what she told him to report (namely the information about the female wolf who had been involved in things) she lets the two brothers talk for the moment as she drops the deer, then tucks in for her favorite part: working on ripping the ears off the skull.
The young alpha nearly panics as Wachiwa sets to finishing the task he started. How is he meant to distract Ikuna by telling him to go bother Wachiwa when this conversation becomes too uncomfortable, as is bound to happen, if Wachiwa is busy? As much as the thought makes Skahla want to beg off talking to Ikuna, he swallows his nerves and looks back to his brother. "Um. Okay." Ah, eloquent as always, our Skahla. After speaking, he manages to make himself sit in an attempt to convince probably himself more than anyone else that he's not going to do what he wants so greatly to do and run off to be alone some more.
It's that, or about this giant bug he saw once, that thing was HUGE - okay, yes. The female wolf. Ikuna looks up at his brother, tail still slowly wagging... though it hesitates a little from the combination of Skah's obvious nervousness and... well, the thing he has to talk about. Still not the happiest of memories. "When... the bird took me," he starts, and then takes a big breath. "It was away from the den, because there was a wolf and she knew my name and tricked me and I followed her there. I dunno who she was, but maybe you do." It's a little scattered and tumbled-together, and he really really hopes it's the right stuff to say, because Skahla looks kinda unhappy and he's all important 'cause he's the alpha and Ikuna doesn't want to mess up, because this is important too.
Yup, good. Good boy, Ikuna. Wachiwa uses a paw to pin the deer's head down as she yanks and gnaws. A sharp rip results in the ears being pulled off, and then Chewy starts in on the throat, thinking maybe she'd take the head too-- but she listens, as well. To give Ikuna courage should he need it, and to give him encouragement should he also need it, looking up from the deer to watch the two.
This is an important thing, isn't it? And appropriately, Skahla's ears perk as he listens, after which his eyes narrow in thought. It's true, he does know every female in the pack. Everyone who should know young Ikuna's name. But even so, he cannot begin to imagine who would have done such a thing, because... why would they? "You're sure about this, Ikuna?" It's really just a stall for time while Skahla thinks, but no matter how much time he buys himself... he doesn't have an answer, and that isn't a comforting idea in the slightest.
The sound of Chewy gnawin' off those ears is kinda a comfort all on its own. Life, proceeding as it should be. Ikuna keeps his attention up his brother, though, and nods firmly. "Yeah! She said Ikuna, an' she said that Tala was hurt so I had to come," insists the boy. He remembers! This isn't some crazy puppy-dream, he's a big boy now! He continues, almost defiantly, "She was kinda slender, and had white fur all over except it was sorta yellow on top of her muzzle and on her back it was yellow too, kinda almost brown there but mostly she was white."
Ears lay back, listening to Ikuna, because Chewy is still annoyed at this. How dare some strange wolf put one of the pups in danger, and for what? Who knows. She narrows her eyes, but doesn't speak up just yet, as she gnaws on the throat of the deer, and then begins chewing at the flesh, too. She rips a good hunk of meat off, and begins gnawing it down, as she listens, before she finally lifts her head, and, moving her precious ears away from the carcass, starts towards the two brothers, speaking softly. "Ikuna, that's very brave of you-- To want to help your sister. It's not your fault this wolf lead you astray," she says, softly, smiling at him, before looking to Skahla. "And now that your brother knows, he can work on finding her so we can ask why she did this. Hopefully it wasn't a malicious thing-- perhaps the bird was threatening to take one of her own pups unless she found another. In which case, she deserves punishment, but not severe."
A horrible thought occurs to Skahla. He is not as social as a wolf should be, and a wolf who would know his brother and possibly want to protect her own pup by offering up a parentless one instead? Thankfully, before he can get too far down that line of thought, he is capable of getting some mental image of Lupin, who is certainly... well, white, partially, but not at all yellow. Right? "Yes. I'll... look into it." As much as it worries him, what he might find, and so in an attempt to bring conversation away from this female wolf, Skahla adds, "But there is something much more important that I hope you, and the other pups, have learned from this, and that is that you don't go anywhere without adults you can trust, right?" Then there's no worry to begin with, since if all of the young wolves obey that, there should be no situation in which one of the pups is called upon to play saviour to another.
Ikuna nods when Chewy tells him it was brave, though he still kind of frowns. Of course he wanted to help, but... he was kind of stupid, too, because he went with a wolf he didn't know. Didn't everyone tell him not to trust strangers? Being brave _is_ good, but he needs to be not-stupid, too. At the mention of a possible motivation for the she-wolf, he does perk an ear and tilt his head a little. "She did say something about a deal," he says consideringly. Maybe... the wolf was just trying to help her family. Like he was helping Tala. Didn't... didn't the bad wolf say that Tala was safe /now/, right before the bird took Ikuna? All this about motivations makes for an extra scoop of confusion on top. So, when Skah reminds him to be careful, the young wolf just sort of nods and murmurs, "Yeah," still partway lost in his thoughts.
Chewy smiles, leaning down to nuzzle at the younger wolf's shoulders. It's not much of a stretch; the boy is almost as big as she had been two years before. "Don't worry about mistakes. We all make them. Remember the story I told you about Asku and the snake." She smiles Then looks to Skahla; she can kind of tell he's not sure what to do. Far be it to her to tell her alpha what he should do.. but she has a suggestion, soft voiced: "The pups are getting old enough now, Skahla, maybe we should start including them in pack duties, so they can learn how we take care of them." She smiles a bit, "And so they can learn to take care of themselves, too."
Skahla turns her gaze to Wachiwa when the female speaks again, and when he responds, he manages to live up to his reputation of being grumpy. "If they're old enough to start taking on such responsibilities, they're old enough to learn what mistakes can cost them, and it certainly is the sort of thing they should worry about. Like Ikuna learned." Not that Skahla seems to blame his brother for what Ikuna's mistake caused not only himself, but also the others in the pack. Notably Wachiwa, who sustained the worst injuries in that battle. He is not of a mind, though, to hobble these pups by implying that life is anything other than difficult and dangerous.
"I'll... think about that too. About ways they can start to help," the alpha adds, by way of trying to soften what he says. After all, he has never had any objections to Wachiwa's optimistic views before. Especially not back when it was him she was trying to cheer up with them.
Ikuna relaxes a little at Chewy's touch, and his tail gives a brief wag. He nods to her reminder that it's okay to make mistakes... even if he does still feel bad about some of his. Especially how she got hurt from that bird. His ears splay a bit as what Skah says. "I learned. I'm gonna do better next time, but I can't make it un-happen," he says with a small scowl that's as much for himself as anyone else. Up his ears perk again, when Chewy talks to Skahla about getting them involved. That's definitely something the pups want! "Asku said he'd help teach us, if you said it was okay," he tells his brother. There's a little white lie there - he's not /entirely/ sure Asku was planning on asking before starting those lessons, but it's more or less true. Anyway, it's still a far leap from having lessons to actually going on patrols or hunting anything bigger than mice. It's a start, though.
A smirk, and Wachiwa reminds, "We were making grave mistakes when we were their age, too, Skahla. We survived. We became better for them, because we learned. I think the pups have learned well, especially Ikuna, from this. To listen to their elders, to never accept what one person has said when it is suspect. Do not be so grave with him. Give them the chance to prove they have learned. The only ones at fault here have already been punished to the most severity, and only the Great Spirits can punish them further now." She moves from Ikuna's side to Skahla's, giving her alpha a nuzzle to the cheek, chin, and shoulder. "And you. You have learned too... haven't you, Skahla. That a leader's place is not hiding from his pack, but standing among them, yes?" She's actually checking this out here; trying to see what Skah will do.
Before Skahla gets a chance to assure Ikuna that, at least, no one expects him to undo what happened, Wachiwa is nuzzling against him, and it's a gesture he willingly accepts and, yes. Even returns. Because despite his self-induced solitude, he craves social interaction like any wolf does. With a deep breath, he says, "I'm there when it matters, aren't I?" Well, no. He isn't. If he were, he would have been there when Ikuna was taken, to prevent it. All the same... "I'm doing my best, Chewy. Really, I am." It's just that his best may not always involve him being in close quarters with wolves around whome he has yet to feel comfortable, since assuming his father's role in the pack. With a glance to his brother, Skahla says, "I'm gonna tell you to do something I always hated hearing when I was your age, yeah? Do as I say, not as I do; you listen to Wachiwa closely, because she's smart." Skahla, on the other hand, is an unstable hothead who is still trying to feel comfortable in his own skin,
Ikuna looks up at Chewy and Skahla as they speak to each other, watching that interaction with the open curiosity of a youngster. When Skah directs his attention once more toward Ikuna, the boy perks his ears and tilts his head to listen. Right, important lesson. Do as... aww, come on. Not with the... wait, is that all? Well, DUH. Of course Chewy's smart. She's pretty much one of the smartest wolves ever, because how else would she know all those stories and have answers for all those puppy questions? Seriously, like that needs saying? His incredulousness shows in his face as he grins and nods.
There's a sudden grin despite the grim discussion; and Wachiwa takes a moment to quickly attempt to tug at Skah's ears, laughing. "You never would have said that when I was his age," she teases at Skah. She'll neveer grow up man, never. With the silly moment passed, she adds, softly, "You are doing your best, Skahla. But you seem to think your best is not good enough. You seem... Distant. You've been aloof.." .. She pauses. Now might be a good time to -- "Ikuna, why don't you go eat something? You're still a growing body after all," she winks the good eye at the pup, then turns to Skahla. "... I want to talk adult talk with your brother a moment anyway, and it'll only bore you."
And there goes Skahla's attempt to slip away clean, like he'd implied he was going to do. As though he needed any more proof that Wachiwa has gotten too smart for her own good... or at least, for his. He waits, patiently, for Ikuna to follow Wachiwa's instructions, before he says, "What if it will bore me too? Does that mean I can go away, now?" The alpha really does mean it only as a joke, though he doesn't hold out much hope for it managing to soften what is bound to be an intensely uncomfortable conversation... just like, oh, any heartfelt conversation he has ever had in his entire life. Wachiwa is, after all, not the only one who has been reluctant to grow up and forced to do so too soon.
Ikuna is right at that age where he isn't sure if adult talk is incredibly boring or strangely fascinating. Still, he only hesitates a few moments before nodding obediently to Chewy. "Okay," he says, and turns around to go trot over to that deer for something to eat. Growing he most certainly is, and filling in the crevices from when he didn't have enough. He pads over to the deer, and looks over it before starting to bite and tug, his paws braced on its belly. Big fierce wolf! Grawr! He's gonna eat that deer so good! Yeah, it's a pretty good distraction, as it turns out. At least for the moment.
And once Ikuna is out of direct earshot, Chewy sits, and looks to Skahla with an expression of softness. "... He suffers from what we suffer from now, too, you know. He's lost his innosence. All the pups have, except maybe Hinto's. But it's not the pups I'm worried about, Skahla. It's you. You.. have been... Avoiding people. The pack. None of us hate you, you know that, right? We all feel the loss of your mother and father even now. But you... Weren't ready for this. It's.. okay, you know? it's okay to be afraid, or feel uncomfortable.. But.. don't let it distance you from the people you love, and who love you." She smiles weakly.
The smile that Skahla gives back to Wachiwa has little humour in it. Mostly, it seems bitter, as he holds onto grudges that have had long months to fester. "I know you don't hate me. And I want to keep it that way." Because, as they say, familiarity breeds contempt" This may be especially true in Skahla's case, as the young alpha still has strange ways about him. Ways that he does his best to keep hidden, so as to not cause other to doubt his ability to lead the pack. Allowing his smile to soften slightly, he says, "A pack doesn't need two alphas to be so involved with everyone. Let your sister be the one everyone loves." Spirit know, she still has a place in his heart, even if he has been so withdrawn that he has no way of knowing she may well have done the same.
A smirk comes from Wachiwa, "We still like to see both alphas from time to time, you know. To make sure you haven't run off and abandoned us." A playfu nudge of paw comes to his own, as she grins to her 'brother-in-law', before she adds, "I could never hate you anyway, Skah. You know me," she teases, before she considers. "Speaking of Shawnee.. How are things going between you two..? Are you.. doing well? Will there be more pups for me to watch this spring?" She asks, playfully, trying to lighten the mood some.
"I wouldn't count on it. And maybe it's for the best, you know? They're still growing anyway, and... well, there's Lupin's pups, and..." And if they were planning on having pups, it is well past time they should have spoken about it. Or spoken about anything, really, but speaking to each other... is really not what Shawnee and Skahla do best. Not since they became alphas, anyway. Besides, Skahla has no idea how to be a father, and he knows that Shawnee doesn't have much idea of how to be a mother. With all the tending to his parents' children, Wachiwa would be a much better option to give the pack a spring litter than he and Shawnee would, wouldn't she?
"Aw," Chewy says, deflating a little, "But I so wanted to tease Shawnee about puppy weight!" She gives Skahla as serious a face as shew can for that.. but it doesn't last long. She giggles amusedly, then nudges at his shoulder with her paw again. "It's okay, Skah, it's.. a lot to think about, being the leader of a pack. I know you two will work it out in time. If we go a year or two without new blood, then so be it. Better for you two not to be stressed." She smiles, then nudges at him again comfortingly with her snout this time. "Besides. Eventually you two will have the neices and nephews I can spoil and turn against you to my heart's content. I can wait." She winks.
"I knew there had to be something sinister you were plotting, Chewy." And who knows. Maybe by next winter, someone will have stepped into the role of beta properly, and Skahla can push the responsibility of having pups onto that wolf. It seems a brilliant idea as the young alpha nuzzles against Wachiwa. "You just keep looking after the pups, and don't worry about anything. Especially me. I'll... take care of the other things, and they need you more than they need anyone else." Certainly more than they need Skahla about, all scowly and moody like he is.
"I dunno. Pups need a good father figure around. If it wasn't for your father, I think I never would have learned a lot of things." Smirks Chewy softly, as she takes lightly to chewing a bit at his fur, in a friendly manner. "You could teach them things. How to hunt, how to patrol the borders. How to look all angry and stern when I know you're really just a ball of cuddlefluff inside." Another tease, but good hearted; chewy has never been good with insulting because she's just so.. happy. She then smiles a bit, and nods toward the carcass and Ikuna. "Your brothers could use guidance in how to become good wolves. I can handle your sisters... But boys need boys once in a while. Besides." She pauses, then, leaning away a bit, she adds, "I am /so/ not handling the 'where puppies come from' when it comes time to tell them more than just 'your parents wished to make something that was a little bit of a both of them' part."
Skahla gives Wachiwa a skeptical look that requires no acting, but that also isn't based on any of her light-hearted teasing. "You said it yourself, Chewy. They need a /good/ father figure around. Make Asku do it. They're fond of him, aren't they?" Plus, what Skahla knows, he figured out largely on his own, and from getting a solid paw across his nose when he got a little too careless about where he was sniffing. No reason his siblings should learn any differently, because Skahla is no more keen than Wachiwa to have those sorts of talks than he was to get them, when he was younger.
"... I hate to tell you this, but, your brother's not exactly father material either." Smirks Chewy in thought. "Spirits know I love him, but... He's too quick to anger... And when Ikuna was gone, I was afraid he would snap at anyone and everyone because of it. Not that it wasn't his right, Ikuna is his little brother too, but.. Level heads would have been better." She sighs, considering how she, too, had failed in levelheadedness at least a few times. ".. Still. You should be around for them when they grow. If not as a father figure, than so they know their Alpha isn't some mystical, omnipotent thing. So they know you, too, are capable of feelings like they are. So they don't think 'I'm not allowed to be sad because Skahla is never sad', or 'Skahla is never happy, I must have done something wrong.'" She pauses, then whispers, "They're afraid of you enough already, Skah. Do you want to turn into 'Old Man Skahla' with the grouchy and the 'Run away he's coming!'?"
Skahla's brow furrows again as Wachiwa speaks, and there is hardly any hesitation at all before he asks, as quietly, "They're afraid of me?" Oh, sure. There were times he was afraid of his father. And his mother, for that matter. It's definitely never something he wanted from his younger siblings, though. And why should they be afraid of /him/? What has he ever done to them, besides be in perhaps the occasional foul mood when they were nearby. Oh... Frowning, Skahla looks at Ikuna and his sleeping companions.
Ikuna chooses that moment for his head to emerge from chewing on tasty, tasty deer. He licks his muzzle - then pauses, mid-lap, as he notices Skahla looking at him. He offers a hesitant wag of his tail, looking back at his elder brother, and then his eyes flick over to Chewy as though to ask why and make sure everything is still all right.
A nod, confidential, as Chewy says, "They think you're always angry at them, and everyone in the pack. I've explained to them that's just your way.. But maybe, once in a while, if you took time out to teach them things, or play with them, they'd see." She smiles a little, "After all. They may almost be adults.. But so are we, and we still need to take time out once in a while to play or just talk. Or even just be there for someone." She nuzzles at his shoulder again, and smiles. ".. Truth be told, I had to coax Ikuna into telling you about the she-wolf because he was afraid you'd hate him for what he did. I told him we would be angrier at the she-wolf for tricking him than we would at him for going, and that he should tell you so we can make sure he's safe."
Nevermind that Skahla was not today, nor has he ever been, terribly keen on speaking to his brother. It still bothers the alpha to find out that his sibling have to be coaxed into talking to him. It's a more convincing argument that he really needs to be spending time with them than anything else ever could be. "Well... maybe... you know, one at a time..." Maybe then it wouldn't be quite so bad. And knowing that Ikuna is apparently so frightened of him at least encourages Skahla to force the frown from his muzzle as the younger male continues looking in their direction.
As Skahla's expression grows less dour, Ikuna's wag becomes less hesitant. Okay. He flashes a smile, then lowers his head for another bite. He's pretty well full, though, and so after another couple nibbles he turns from the deer and trots aside a few steps. What now? Chewy and Skahla still look to be in the throes of that Serious Adult Conversation, so he can't go back there. Boring or not, he's pretty sure he's not supposed to be listening to it.
"That's a good start. Give them all one on one time with you, so they can see you aren't some great and powerful frowny face." She smiles. Chewy then watches Ikuna, and adds, "Why not start with him now? Ikuna, I mean. Tell him a story, or teach him how to look gruff so that he can scare prey." She grins, and then adds, "Or even teach him on the deer the best place to bite for a quick and kind kill."
Now? Like... now, now? Skahla's frown almost returns, but after a moment, the alpha gives a small nod. He has no excuse not to get started now, so... "Ikuna? Can you come here?" Oh, this isn't going to be at all pleasant. Especially not now that he knows his youngest brother is so reluctant to speak with him. While waiting for Ikuna to wander over, Skahla stands. Because if the two of them must have some kind of terribly awkward interaction... it must be for the best that it doesn't happen where everyone in Ute, or just those in the area immediately surrounding the den, can witness it.
Just a nice, unthreatening little wolf. That's all, right? Ikuna continues his look around for something to do. His friends still seem to be asleep, and while he's not going to go and wake them up, he doesn't really want to join them right now either. He's had enough of trying to rest. When his name is called, he perks up his ears, and trots on over, looking up questioningly at Skahla. "Uh-huh?" he asks. It's probably more admonitions about how to be safe or something. It does seem like Chewy's right, that Skah is just... worried. And grumpy about it.
A smirk, as Chewy leans in to nuzzle at Skah's shoulder. "You'll do /fine/," she says, smiling. "Your mother would be proud of you, and so would your father. Just.. think about it like when you were young." She smiles, then stands, and starts trotting back towards the den, pausing as she passes Ikuna to murmur, "It'll be fine, you'll see. You'll have fun." She smiles, gives him a lick to his back, and then completes her journey to the deer, whee she begins ripping off chunks to drag down to the others hiding from the cold.
"We're going to just... go on a little walk together, okay?" Yeah, sure. This will be fine, and not at all traumatising. Well, for the pup, that might prove to be true. Skahla has some serious doubts about whether it will be true for him, though, but it's rather too late to back out of it now. Giving Wachiwa a faint, and force smile, Skahla then turns, as to begin the walk with Ikuna, where, if he is very lucky, the boy will drive the majority of the conversation and keep Skahla from having to do so.
Ikuna nods to Chewy's comment as she steps past him, and wags his tail for a moment. Fun, okay. So maybe it isn't a lecture? He keeps his attention on Skahla, waiting for explanations of this thing called 'fun' according to his elder brother. A walk. "Okay," says Ikuna. He trots forward to a spot by his elder brother's side as Skah turns, looking up at him with a friendly and inquisitive expression. Just waiting for Skahla to say more, as they walk along.
It is some time of walking in perhaps not-so-companionable silence before Skahla manages to think of anything to say, and when he does, he takes one of Wachiwa's suggestions. He can tell stories as well as anyone else, right? And is that not part of what drove him to want to become alpha? To honour the stories he heard about wolves he never met? Of course, none of those stories are coming to mind, just now. It is, apparently, a lot harder than it seems. "So... Ikuna... I mean, that is... Okay. Hi." Maybe he /can't/ tell stories, given that his attempt to start one turns out like that. Skahla is no more comfortable one-on-one with this pup than he was when they're all in a group, though, and the older male's body language betrays that clearly.
Ikuna trots along at Skahla's side, looking up at his elder brother as they walk. His ears perk at every start to conversation, and then fall back when it turns into nothing. The youngster can read Skah's unease pretty clearly, and after a few more moments, he decides to take matters into his own paws. After all, his big Alpha brother isn't the scariest thing he's ever met, right? He's probably not even the scariest thing Ikuna has made friends with. Yeah, that cougar was only a cub, but still. So! He starts a conversation. "What's it like being an Alpha? I know it means being in charge and takin' care of everybody, but what's it like?"
There we go. A question. Something he can answer. Though it's not a particularly easy question to answer, it still gives him something to go from, which is greatly appreciated since Wachiwa is not here, with her neverending ideas for conversation. "It's... not what I ever thought it would be. My... that is, our... our parents always made it look so easy. So natural. But it's just..." Not the sort of thing that a pup, even one who has experienced the sorts of things Ikuna has experienced, should worry about. "Well, what do you think it would be like, hmm?"
Ikuna listens carefully to Skah's answer, nodding a little. When the question gets turned back on him, he frowns a little. "I think there'd be lots of worrying," he says, looking out at the ground in front of him instead of up at his brother. He's quiet for a few steps, then adds, "Like how I got worried when Kachina didn' eat, 'cause if she died I'd be all alone. But sometimes I couldn't do anything, 'cause there wasn't even any fish to try an' make her eat. So I just worried."
"Kachina... that was...?" Skahla doesn't finish the question, yet, because though he never did speak with her, he can figure out that it was the young cub they had with them for a time. And since Ikuna has brought it up... "Listen, Ikuna... What I said earlier... Okay, let me say this a different way. How much have you heard about the first alpha of this pack, hmm? The one... I was named after. Me... and my sister. Our sister."
Ikuna keeps on staring at the ground, thinking about all that worrying, until the mention of his name makes him look up. He blinks a litle at the question, and tries to think. Uhm. He ends up just shaking his head. "I dunno... anything, really." Back to being storytime again, perhaps, but at least now there's a story to be told. Ikuna looks up, curiosity edging out the reliving of his memories.
"Skelaghe. I only met her once or twice, when I was really little, and I don't... really remember much. At least, I don't think I do. But Mom... Mom loved her a lot, and we heard a lot about her, when we were growing up. I remember being told, just once... Well, the important part of it is this. Skelaghe was very loved. She had a lot of loyal packmates, even once her mate left. Even when she was all on her own, she was always the alpha of this pack while she was here. But this... this alpha, beloved by all... even she was not perfect, Ikuna. She made mistakes. She got hurt, and sometimes she made those around her hurt. Sometimes, she made Mom hurt." It is hardly the coherant story that others, like Wachiwa, would tell, but the message is there. Skahla heard, when his parents were still alive, Skelaghe spoken of so lovingly, despite all her mistakes. All the pain that some of her actions caused.
Ikuna looks up at Skahla, with those earnest eyes, and those perked ears, and listens to that somewhat story and tries to make sense of it. The beloved alpha - and the maker of mistakes. Hurting people, being hurt, but love through it all. That story, inept as it is, sort of catalyzes another thought, one that's been lurking around in his head. "Mistakes... mistakes still hurt people. Even if they forgive you, it's not okay," he says, his face wrinkled with deep thoughts. "It's not okay, but... sometimes you can't help it. And... if people love you, they forgive you. Even though you hurt them, and that's not okay."
"Yes, that is what I said, isn't it?" That mistakes have consequences, and that the pups need to understand that. "And you're right, Ikuna. It's not okay to cause the ones we care about... to cause them pain." As Skahla should well know, from being on both sides of that process. "You know probably better than some of the adults here that we can never ignore our mistakes. That doing so... may cause something much worse than just someone we love getting a little hurt. We have to be careful. But even with everything I said, Ikuna... it is still important to know that the ones who love us won't stop loving us because we made a mistake. That even someone who made mistakes that got people hurt as one of the most loved animals I've ever heard about. And that... I don't blame you, or expect you to take back your mistake. And that... you really don't have to be afraid of me. You understand all of that, right?" Of course, Skahla's "story" should have a self-serving purpose, because he truly does not want his youngest family members to fear him.
Ikuna nods consideringly. It is what Skahla said, at least... if understood from the right perspective. It's a hard perspective to reach, sometimes. Making mistakes is bad, but it's not the end of the world. Hurting the people you love is bad, but sometimes... you'll still do it. And that doesn't mean you should stop trying, but even when you try your hardest, you'll sometimes fail, and hurt people, and that's _still_ not the end of the world. "I'm not really scared," he says, and it's even sort of true. It's the sort of truth that has a seed and the will to make it grow. "You're my brother." Then he lifts his head up, and offers a nuzzle to his brother's shoulder.
Skahla stops walking when Ikuna nuzzles at him, and after a moment of hesitation, he lowers his head to nose quickly against Ikuna's. "Yes... yes, I am. I'm not like Wachiwa. I can't tell stories." That much is now glaringly obvious. "And I don't... play. Like, you know. The others. But I am your brother, Ikuna... and... I do care for you, you know." Bleh. Honesty. "So, you know... As long as you know that, then..." We never have to speak of it again, Skahla continues silently, in his head.
Ikuna smiles as Skahla accepts his nuzzle, and even returns it. His tail wags gently, and he nods. No, Skahla isn't really a storytelling sort. And... well, it's true that Ikuna hasn't /seen/ him playing, but he's heard about how it used to be. Still, people do change sometimes, so he nods. "I love you too, Skahla," he says with that puppy earnestness. Fortunately, or maybe not, none of the rest of the pack are here to see this moment. He finishes the sentence on his own, "Then I won't be scared, even when we both make mistakes sometimes. Because we're family, an' we love each other."
"Right." Skahla begins walking again, content to have Ikuna believe that's what he meant to say. This whole talking thing... has proven to be as uncomfortable as Skahla imagined it would. "Now. If you and the others are to take on more responsibility, then come. Let me show you the borders of Ute land, okay?"
Ikuna nods, and he trots quickly after his brother to catch up. "Okay." This is important, serious, bigwolf business, and Ikuna wants to learn it all. So he gives it his whole attention, and those mushy thoughts are left behind pretty much entirely. He'll come back to them later... by which time Skahla will probably have safely slipped off elsewhere and won't have to deal with the awkwardness.