Post by ama on May 4, 2008 12:22:47 GMT -5
Hey folks! Some of you may know/remember me. Even if you don't, here's the thing: I was an active RPer on Meadows when I first joined, but RL swamped me (it has such convenient timing, eh? ><) and I ended up going inactive and my characters, Ama and Shad, were @toaded. Welp, once I finally returned from my "death to the art-world" (Hey, I didn't even check my email, dA or... anything!), I got around to checking my dA account and saw that I was being poked and prodded to return. I could stay away. :) So I've returned to Meadows, and this is my first RP with Ama after her disappearance.
Characters: Ama (Former Amaranth Sister), Chesmu (Amaranth Chieftan) [Sorry I don't have their descriptions up.]
Summary: After more than a year of wandering alone, away from Amaranth, the cougaress named Ama has chosen to return to the tribe she left. But things have changed in the year she's been gone, and she may be unable to return. She's seeking a second chance... but will the new chieftan give it to her?
Location:
Stone Formations
================================================================================
After moving out of the forest a bit, though still surrounded by trees, a clearing comes into view. Rocks jut from the ground in no apparent pattern, at least not easily discernible from the ground. The rocks seem to form an elliptical shape, sort of like an egg, an oval amongst the grasses growing here. While the inner oval appears to have rocks that have been weathered down to about 3 feet tall, the outer oval's rocks are taller yet, about 6 feet tall, though they, too, have signs of weathering as much as the inner oval has. What has made the outer rocks survive better than the others? It appears they are the same types of rock, the same age, and the same amount of weathering, but they are just bigger than the others. This is something that could be pondered for days, if not longer. The overall feel of the place is a feeling of sacredness, or something akin to a sprituality that one feels when confronted with the unkown: a bit scary, a bit odd, but very intriguing.
=================================== Exits ===================================
[East] to the Wooded Terrain [South] to the Pine Grove
[Southeast] to the Highlands
================================================================================
The sun has risen well over the horizon and this, a surprisingly clear day. The sky, though not cloudless, allows the sun to shine onto the snow-covered ground in all its glory. In all its very /bright/ glory. Ama is forced to squint against the glare of the sunlight on snow as she pads carefully through the white stuff. It's been ... a long time. Longer than she would've liked. Or perhaps it's been just long enough? She's not really sure. The only thing she /is/ fairly certain of is that she will not be remembered. The cougaress stops suddenly as a familiar area reaches her eyes. "Amaranth," she whispers, her eyes widening as she finds herself smiling absent-mindedly. For a moment, emotions almost overwhelm her, and the usually /overly/ cautious feline prepares to bound forward before remembering herself. She had to be as cautious as if she were new. It had... almost a year now? She would not be remembered... so her steps are heavy as she begins forward again, towards the land of the cougars.
The Chieftain continues about his usual business: Patrols. Patrols. More Patrols. The snow has been making the patrols a little more interesting, Chesmu must admit, in the sense of there being extreme cold now. Personally, for the Chieftain, there's never been joy in snow, though he has learned that his cubs are somewhat happy for the most part about what is happening. Though Pelutho, his best friend's cub, is not crazy about the snow either. It amazes Chesmu how much a cougar's own personality is already set in cubhood. He considers his own nature as a prime example. And then he catches a strange scent. A female. A *strange* female he does not know. He decides to turn around to investigate.
She pauses. That tree -- she remembers that one. Her time in the land was brief, but she had distinct memories of some of the places. One of them involved meeting a fellow cougaress... what was the name again? No matter. Ama looks straight ahead and moves on again, her head lowered as she stalks on with something like purpose in her movements. Life had lead her away from this place once. She had believed being here was /wrong/ ... but her journey away had allowed her to mature a little more. She's ready to try Amaranth again. If she can get in. Again. Then she sees the rocks. She pauses a second time, her tail-tip flickering. She has yet to realize she's not alone. Of course, she hasn't scented anyone else. Yet. Curling her tail, she presses forward yet again, nearer the border.
"Halt there, stranger." Chesmu says, then runs over to the cougaress. His face betrays no caution, but no anger. "Explain yourself for crossing into Amaranth, the territory of the Chieftain Chesmu!" Chesmu is still not quite set on a good way of challenging would-be intruders. "You are female."
It seems quiet here. Is there no one patrolling the borders? Even as she thinks this, a voice splits the air and all at once she jerks into a defensive posture. There she freezes, eyes wide. She didn't hear him coming. Didn't see him. Didn't smell him. What is /wrong/ with her today? Blinking slowly -- it's the only thing her mind will allow her to do properly at the moment -- she steadies her gaze on the form of a male. A male that calls himself... Chieftan? Though her memory is dim, she's certain he's not the cat that once ruled Amaranth. Maybe she's been away too long, indeed. Straightening cautiously, she forces herself to look as confidently at the male without disrespecting his authority. "Forgive me," she says, her voice soft, only barely reaching a normal conversational level. She pauses, considering her words carefully, "I am... returning to Amaranth after a long time away. My name is Ama."
Chesmu says, "Sister Ama, or so you claim, for what reason have you been away for so long?" Chesmu says, not identifying himself in full, yet. Though he feels this female is no threat. He must send a message: He is the Chieftain, and he is strong. No funny stuff, now. "I trust you have not abandoned your sisterhood in the tribe."
She's... surprised. She can't help it. He believes her? Or at least is hearing her out. In any case, she must explain herself, and explain herself she shall: "I came to Amaranth seeking... a life. Trying new things. I was uncertain, at best," she says, her voice only softening as she speaks, as though she may be ashamed. But her voice lifts again, for she fears she may not be heard otherwise. "I left and simply did not return one day." But... did she abandon the tribe? Had she done anything to give the tribe a bad name? She simply... left. Without a word. Without a trace. And, she doubted she had ever been missed. She hesitates, and her eyes flicker away from the chieftan to look at the place on her left shoulder where, once, she bore a marking: a marking that indicated her uncertainty. "My marking is gone now. Washed away. If Amaranth will have me back, I will return," she murmurs, then as an afterthought, "...gladly. I would return gladly. I-I would not abandon Amaranth again." Did she sound uncertain? She hopes not. But uncertainty seems to be a very part of her nature; Ama is ever-questioning, ever-wondering.
Chesmu eyes this female for a long time. Weighing his options. What he knows about the ways of Amaranth. She had washed away her marking? Chesmu thinks on this a while longer. "Do you miss the markin? Would you want it returned to you?" In Amaranth law, the marking is taken seriously, if she wants it back, then Chesmu might just accept this sister back in the fold, otherwise...
Her eyes remain locked on her own shoulder. Though her cautious nature would ordinarily keep her focused on the male cougar, a wistfulness keeps her looking away, at least for a moment. It had washed away. She had tried to wash it off herself. She wouldn't have Amaranth's name squandered -- or at least she told herself that was why. But she had failed. It had not washed away, only faded. Time -- and the shedding of her pelt -- had removed all signs. Her eyes return to Chesmu, and she seems... determined. "Yes. I would take it back." Then she pauses, a new look crossing her face. The old cougar, the shamaness, probably knew she wouldn't stick around... "If I must take it back, then I will. If that's what it takes to return to Amaranth."
Chesmu eyes the female, then begins to pace about her. She doesn't sound very committed to the Chieftain's ears. "Sister Ama." Chesmu says. "I must be frank. You do not sound like you desire the marking. Only accepting it for the sake of rejoining the tribe. It does not sound like you want this."
The chief's answer is... disappointing. Ama has changed, at least a little, since she was last here. She has to wonder: is Paoro still around? ...no. It wouldn't matter. She lowers her eyes, nodding slowly. "I see." She isn't one to argue, but... she wants to be back. "I-I-" she stops herself. She's /stuttering/. Her brows furrow briefly, frustrated with herself. Then, she lifts her eyes again, slowly. "I- is there any way, I can... redeem myself? Is there any way I can prove I /want/ this?" She's not very good at expressing herself. "I'm not the same cougar I was when I left, more than a year ago..." she lowers her eyes again.
Chesmu says, "And who were you a year ago, Sister Ama, that you have changed to wanting your place in the tribe?" Chesmu says. He's not big on passing this form of judgement on the female. And he has no doubts of her authenticity, but he must know if she understands more about being an Amaranth sister."
The cougaress is forced to stop and reconsider her current position. A seed of doubt enters her mind. Can she really back up her words? Ama can't bring herself to lift her eyes again in her moment of uncertainty, and, instead, lowers her head. "Please, understand: I did not give Amaranth the chance it deserved, I left without even a good-bye! I did not know what I wanted. I did not understand then, and-" her voice has risen. Not very much, but it has. Ama stops herself when she realizes she's being a little louder than usual, and for a moment she feels ashamed. Can she really say why? Only that she /did/. "...I cannot claim I understand it, even now." Her voice is softer again, perhaps a little sad. That's no way to convince him of /anything/. And she realizes it, so she stops now, while she's ahead. A meager smile somehow reaches her maw, though, and she dares lift her eyes. "I wish to give Amaranth the chance I did not give it before. ...but I suppose I may be wasting your time in these winter months," she murmurs, supressing an urge to hang her head, and forcing the bare smile onto her maw in a good-mannered way. Would she not get a second chance?
Chesmu considers this female a good moment longer. "You are sincere." Chesmu says. "You want your marking, and you want to return to your home." Chesmu respects that. If he had one of his cubs here he could almost treat it like a lesson. "Welcome home, Sister Ama. I am Chieftain Chesmu."
She bows her head, her smile slipping away. If she cannot return, she will go elsewhere. She must. And just as she believes she is ready to face the rejection, he... welcomes her home. Ama blinks several times in disbelief, then lifts her head to look at Chesmu with a smile. This one is warmer, happier, and... relieved. She can't find words, but she smiles, and hopefully it's enough for the moment. The cougaress bows her head deeply, respectfully, "Thank you, Chieftan." It means more to her than he might ever know.
"I suppose you are confused as to why I am here and Ahiga is not." Chesmu says. "It is important to remember that time tends to bring about the most change in others. The sickness came, and Ahiga departed and has not been seen since. Paoro stepped down as Matron and her daughter, Ayashe, took her place. Ayashe, the Matron, is my mate. I was chosen to keep the tribe safe. I am different in many ways from Ahiga. I'm younger, but woe be to he who crosses my path who means my family harm."
Ama lifts her head a little higher as Chesmu speaks. "I... see," she nods slowly, understanding filling her eyes. Time changes many things. It changes others for good, or for bad. She remembers Paoro well. The matron was the first cougar within the tribe she had met. That and a then-cub names Shasta. ...Shasta. What had ever become of that dear thing? "Thank you for telling me. Is... is the old shamaness, is she still...?" Ama hesitated a moment. Is the shamaness still... alive? Donoma. That rusty feline had scared the /crap/ outta Ama. And yet, now Ama looks back on it in a strangely fond sort of way. She hopes the old cougar is still living...
"The dear shamaness is alive and well, Sister Ama." Chesmu says. "And a happy grandmother, I might add." Chesmu never knew Shasta. "She was part of the reason I found myself here instead of in my old life of wandering alone and unfulfilled."
Ama only met the shamaness once, and that was enough to impress the old coot into Ama's memory forever. Donoma is just one of those sort of cats. Again, Ama finds herself smiling. She's glad to hear that Donoma's still living. For now, Ama's questions have been answered, and she is content in her acceptance once more. She has much learning to do still, for as she said, she did not give Amaranth the chance it deserved before. She will recieve her marking in due time, and be what she was afraid to be before. ...not that she's /not/ scared; she is. She always has been a doubter... but now, she should take her leave. "Thank you, Chieftan. I suppose I should see out the shamaness as I did once before," she says, her voice soft but certain, despite her wording. "I'll be forever grateful for your acceptance."
The problem is, when Chesmu said "shamaness" he really meant Paoro, not her mother, Donoma. Not knowing this is what Ama is thinking, however, the Chieftain continues on, "Such a thing is wise, so that you may get your markings again."
"So I shall," she murmurs in response, then, for the first time since she stopped before Chesmu, she steps forward in the direction of... home. Running the previous words of the Chieftan through her mind, she supposes she can relate to him easily enough: wandering alone, unfulfilled... yes, she knew the feeling well. But here, she's sure she's found what she's looking for once again; she will not leave again. But now she must go to find the shamaness. And maybe look for some dinner along the way. As she comes nearer the male, she looks towards him, pauses to dip her head one last time and murmur a quick "Farewell," then moves on her way. She's back, and she feels happy for the first time in a long time.
Characters: Ama (Former Amaranth Sister), Chesmu (Amaranth Chieftan) [Sorry I don't have their descriptions up.]
Summary: After more than a year of wandering alone, away from Amaranth, the cougaress named Ama has chosen to return to the tribe she left. But things have changed in the year she's been gone, and she may be unable to return. She's seeking a second chance... but will the new chieftan give it to her?
Location:
Stone Formations
================================================================================
After moving out of the forest a bit, though still surrounded by trees, a clearing comes into view. Rocks jut from the ground in no apparent pattern, at least not easily discernible from the ground. The rocks seem to form an elliptical shape, sort of like an egg, an oval amongst the grasses growing here. While the inner oval appears to have rocks that have been weathered down to about 3 feet tall, the outer oval's rocks are taller yet, about 6 feet tall, though they, too, have signs of weathering as much as the inner oval has. What has made the outer rocks survive better than the others? It appears they are the same types of rock, the same age, and the same amount of weathering, but they are just bigger than the others. This is something that could be pondered for days, if not longer. The overall feel of the place is a feeling of sacredness, or something akin to a sprituality that one feels when confronted with the unkown: a bit scary, a bit odd, but very intriguing.
=================================== Exits ===================================
[East] to the Wooded Terrain [South] to the Pine Grove
[Southeast] to the Highlands
================================================================================
The sun has risen well over the horizon and this, a surprisingly clear day. The sky, though not cloudless, allows the sun to shine onto the snow-covered ground in all its glory. In all its very /bright/ glory. Ama is forced to squint against the glare of the sunlight on snow as she pads carefully through the white stuff. It's been ... a long time. Longer than she would've liked. Or perhaps it's been just long enough? She's not really sure. The only thing she /is/ fairly certain of is that she will not be remembered. The cougaress stops suddenly as a familiar area reaches her eyes. "Amaranth," she whispers, her eyes widening as she finds herself smiling absent-mindedly. For a moment, emotions almost overwhelm her, and the usually /overly/ cautious feline prepares to bound forward before remembering herself. She had to be as cautious as if she were new. It had... almost a year now? She would not be remembered... so her steps are heavy as she begins forward again, towards the land of the cougars.
The Chieftain continues about his usual business: Patrols. Patrols. More Patrols. The snow has been making the patrols a little more interesting, Chesmu must admit, in the sense of there being extreme cold now. Personally, for the Chieftain, there's never been joy in snow, though he has learned that his cubs are somewhat happy for the most part about what is happening. Though Pelutho, his best friend's cub, is not crazy about the snow either. It amazes Chesmu how much a cougar's own personality is already set in cubhood. He considers his own nature as a prime example. And then he catches a strange scent. A female. A *strange* female he does not know. He decides to turn around to investigate.
She pauses. That tree -- she remembers that one. Her time in the land was brief, but she had distinct memories of some of the places. One of them involved meeting a fellow cougaress... what was the name again? No matter. Ama looks straight ahead and moves on again, her head lowered as she stalks on with something like purpose in her movements. Life had lead her away from this place once. She had believed being here was /wrong/ ... but her journey away had allowed her to mature a little more. She's ready to try Amaranth again. If she can get in. Again. Then she sees the rocks. She pauses a second time, her tail-tip flickering. She has yet to realize she's not alone. Of course, she hasn't scented anyone else. Yet. Curling her tail, she presses forward yet again, nearer the border.
"Halt there, stranger." Chesmu says, then runs over to the cougaress. His face betrays no caution, but no anger. "Explain yourself for crossing into Amaranth, the territory of the Chieftain Chesmu!" Chesmu is still not quite set on a good way of challenging would-be intruders. "You are female."
It seems quiet here. Is there no one patrolling the borders? Even as she thinks this, a voice splits the air and all at once she jerks into a defensive posture. There she freezes, eyes wide. She didn't hear him coming. Didn't see him. Didn't smell him. What is /wrong/ with her today? Blinking slowly -- it's the only thing her mind will allow her to do properly at the moment -- she steadies her gaze on the form of a male. A male that calls himself... Chieftan? Though her memory is dim, she's certain he's not the cat that once ruled Amaranth. Maybe she's been away too long, indeed. Straightening cautiously, she forces herself to look as confidently at the male without disrespecting his authority. "Forgive me," she says, her voice soft, only barely reaching a normal conversational level. She pauses, considering her words carefully, "I am... returning to Amaranth after a long time away. My name is Ama."
Chesmu says, "Sister Ama, or so you claim, for what reason have you been away for so long?" Chesmu says, not identifying himself in full, yet. Though he feels this female is no threat. He must send a message: He is the Chieftain, and he is strong. No funny stuff, now. "I trust you have not abandoned your sisterhood in the tribe."
She's... surprised. She can't help it. He believes her? Or at least is hearing her out. In any case, she must explain herself, and explain herself she shall: "I came to Amaranth seeking... a life. Trying new things. I was uncertain, at best," she says, her voice only softening as she speaks, as though she may be ashamed. But her voice lifts again, for she fears she may not be heard otherwise. "I left and simply did not return one day." But... did she abandon the tribe? Had she done anything to give the tribe a bad name? She simply... left. Without a word. Without a trace. And, she doubted she had ever been missed. She hesitates, and her eyes flicker away from the chieftan to look at the place on her left shoulder where, once, she bore a marking: a marking that indicated her uncertainty. "My marking is gone now. Washed away. If Amaranth will have me back, I will return," she murmurs, then as an afterthought, "...gladly. I would return gladly. I-I would not abandon Amaranth again." Did she sound uncertain? She hopes not. But uncertainty seems to be a very part of her nature; Ama is ever-questioning, ever-wondering.
Chesmu eyes this female for a long time. Weighing his options. What he knows about the ways of Amaranth. She had washed away her marking? Chesmu thinks on this a while longer. "Do you miss the markin? Would you want it returned to you?" In Amaranth law, the marking is taken seriously, if she wants it back, then Chesmu might just accept this sister back in the fold, otherwise...
Her eyes remain locked on her own shoulder. Though her cautious nature would ordinarily keep her focused on the male cougar, a wistfulness keeps her looking away, at least for a moment. It had washed away. She had tried to wash it off herself. She wouldn't have Amaranth's name squandered -- or at least she told herself that was why. But she had failed. It had not washed away, only faded. Time -- and the shedding of her pelt -- had removed all signs. Her eyes return to Chesmu, and she seems... determined. "Yes. I would take it back." Then she pauses, a new look crossing her face. The old cougar, the shamaness, probably knew she wouldn't stick around... "If I must take it back, then I will. If that's what it takes to return to Amaranth."
Chesmu eyes the female, then begins to pace about her. She doesn't sound very committed to the Chieftain's ears. "Sister Ama." Chesmu says. "I must be frank. You do not sound like you desire the marking. Only accepting it for the sake of rejoining the tribe. It does not sound like you want this."
The chief's answer is... disappointing. Ama has changed, at least a little, since she was last here. She has to wonder: is Paoro still around? ...no. It wouldn't matter. She lowers her eyes, nodding slowly. "I see." She isn't one to argue, but... she wants to be back. "I-I-" she stops herself. She's /stuttering/. Her brows furrow briefly, frustrated with herself. Then, she lifts her eyes again, slowly. "I- is there any way, I can... redeem myself? Is there any way I can prove I /want/ this?" She's not very good at expressing herself. "I'm not the same cougar I was when I left, more than a year ago..." she lowers her eyes again.
Chesmu says, "And who were you a year ago, Sister Ama, that you have changed to wanting your place in the tribe?" Chesmu says. He's not big on passing this form of judgement on the female. And he has no doubts of her authenticity, but he must know if she understands more about being an Amaranth sister."
The cougaress is forced to stop and reconsider her current position. A seed of doubt enters her mind. Can she really back up her words? Ama can't bring herself to lift her eyes again in her moment of uncertainty, and, instead, lowers her head. "Please, understand: I did not give Amaranth the chance it deserved, I left without even a good-bye! I did not know what I wanted. I did not understand then, and-" her voice has risen. Not very much, but it has. Ama stops herself when she realizes she's being a little louder than usual, and for a moment she feels ashamed. Can she really say why? Only that she /did/. "...I cannot claim I understand it, even now." Her voice is softer again, perhaps a little sad. That's no way to convince him of /anything/. And she realizes it, so she stops now, while she's ahead. A meager smile somehow reaches her maw, though, and she dares lift her eyes. "I wish to give Amaranth the chance I did not give it before. ...but I suppose I may be wasting your time in these winter months," she murmurs, supressing an urge to hang her head, and forcing the bare smile onto her maw in a good-mannered way. Would she not get a second chance?
Chesmu considers this female a good moment longer. "You are sincere." Chesmu says. "You want your marking, and you want to return to your home." Chesmu respects that. If he had one of his cubs here he could almost treat it like a lesson. "Welcome home, Sister Ama. I am Chieftain Chesmu."
She bows her head, her smile slipping away. If she cannot return, she will go elsewhere. She must. And just as she believes she is ready to face the rejection, he... welcomes her home. Ama blinks several times in disbelief, then lifts her head to look at Chesmu with a smile. This one is warmer, happier, and... relieved. She can't find words, but she smiles, and hopefully it's enough for the moment. The cougaress bows her head deeply, respectfully, "Thank you, Chieftan." It means more to her than he might ever know.
"I suppose you are confused as to why I am here and Ahiga is not." Chesmu says. "It is important to remember that time tends to bring about the most change in others. The sickness came, and Ahiga departed and has not been seen since. Paoro stepped down as Matron and her daughter, Ayashe, took her place. Ayashe, the Matron, is my mate. I was chosen to keep the tribe safe. I am different in many ways from Ahiga. I'm younger, but woe be to he who crosses my path who means my family harm."
Ama lifts her head a little higher as Chesmu speaks. "I... see," she nods slowly, understanding filling her eyes. Time changes many things. It changes others for good, or for bad. She remembers Paoro well. The matron was the first cougar within the tribe she had met. That and a then-cub names Shasta. ...Shasta. What had ever become of that dear thing? "Thank you for telling me. Is... is the old shamaness, is she still...?" Ama hesitated a moment. Is the shamaness still... alive? Donoma. That rusty feline had scared the /crap/ outta Ama. And yet, now Ama looks back on it in a strangely fond sort of way. She hopes the old cougar is still living...
"The dear shamaness is alive and well, Sister Ama." Chesmu says. "And a happy grandmother, I might add." Chesmu never knew Shasta. "She was part of the reason I found myself here instead of in my old life of wandering alone and unfulfilled."
Ama only met the shamaness once, and that was enough to impress the old coot into Ama's memory forever. Donoma is just one of those sort of cats. Again, Ama finds herself smiling. She's glad to hear that Donoma's still living. For now, Ama's questions have been answered, and she is content in her acceptance once more. She has much learning to do still, for as she said, she did not give Amaranth the chance it deserved before. She will recieve her marking in due time, and be what she was afraid to be before. ...not that she's /not/ scared; she is. She always has been a doubter... but now, she should take her leave. "Thank you, Chieftan. I suppose I should see out the shamaness as I did once before," she says, her voice soft but certain, despite her wording. "I'll be forever grateful for your acceptance."
The problem is, when Chesmu said "shamaness" he really meant Paoro, not her mother, Donoma. Not knowing this is what Ama is thinking, however, the Chieftain continues on, "Such a thing is wise, so that you may get your markings again."
"So I shall," she murmurs in response, then, for the first time since she stopped before Chesmu, she steps forward in the direction of... home. Running the previous words of the Chieftan through her mind, she supposes she can relate to him easily enough: wandering alone, unfulfilled... yes, she knew the feeling well. But here, she's sure she's found what she's looking for once again; she will not leave again. But now she must go to find the shamaness. And maybe look for some dinner along the way. As she comes nearer the male, she looks towards him, pauses to dip her head one last time and murmur a quick "Farewell," then moves on her way. She's back, and she feels happy for the first time in a long time.